Meeting the Pope..
I am not too sure where to post this..in Religion ? Sports or in Travel and Holidays, anyway here goes... I was in my shed hitting something with an hammer and thinking about the up and coming Rugby match on Saturday (for my American and Canadian readers, Rugby..a sport..like American football but without the body armour) when my mind drifted to a trip to Rome
Many moons ago I met the Pope, when I say met, he was on a balcony and I was in St Peter Square
A few ex military guys and myself had decided to go to Rome to watch the Italy England rugby game it was a weekend so we did the sites before the match
We kicked off with St. Peter’s Square right...The whole place was packed, nuns everywhere like a bloody enormous penguin colony.
The female tourists have on their "I'm With Stupid" t-shirts. There were ‘men’ are in blue jean cutoffs, showing far too much cleavage ... We steered away from them,
Do you know what it sounds like when 30,000 sweaty-faced god botherers walk into St. Peter's Square wearing flip-flops? Yes! It sounds like a thousand Canadian geese farting.
They were all waiting for the big man to do his thing, they were all craving answers. And what better way to provide them answers they deserve than with an hour long speech during which he spoke in mostly indecipherable English, frequently making references to holy passages that have astoundingly little relevance to any current situation they may be facing, and occasionally lapse into long periods of silence during which we, were pretty confident that he had dropped off, so we slopped off to the local boozer for some of that Absinthe stuff much favoured by the Popehood, Bloody Hell! After 6 of them I now understand why he is always carried around in a bloody big chair!
We had a guick gander at the Coliseum, which will look quite grand when it’s finished, it’s where Russel Crowe in the film Gladiator chopped off the head of Gluteus Maximus and won a medal or something. There was a quick tour of of a chapel which had a nice ceiling personally I thought it was a bit garish, I am not not one for pictures of naked little cherubs staring down at me. It was kinda Pervy staring up at them. A quick going over with a roller brush and a 5 litre can of Matt magnolia would have made it gentler on the eyes. There was a big fountain which people threw money into in order to keep the water flowing I think. Anyway it was a nice weekend and England won.