Introduction in verse
I hope that I may be excused if I take this opportunity to introduce myself by way of one of my poems. I write purely for amusement.
OLD MAN'S LAMENT.
Me tabs don't work, I'm Mutt and Jeff,
now me hair is falling out.
Me bladder leaks, me right knee creaks,
and I've got a touch of gout.
I don't know where I put me spec's.
Not in the fridge, first place I looked.
Now I smell burning from the stove.
Oh, I fear my goose is cooked.
Maybe, I should have paid more note,
When warned of whisky drinking
But it's still music to my ears.
To hear those glasses clinking.
But there's one thing that worries me
It concerns “my little friend”
Why does he constantly ignore,
The firm messages I send?
My doctor said, it's hard to tell,
But thinks the drink's to blame for it.
I said “I'd better come next week,
When you've sobered up a bit”.
So I shall take me off to bed
And face yet another plight.
How do you get a good night's sleep,
When you need three wees a night?