Dementia ....

My ol gal that I look out for has dementia now, its been brewing for a good while.
She lost her umbrella, so I said I would get her one. Saw a nice one in Tesco, had birdies on it but, when I was showing her, it was a struggle for us and made of plastic !
I looked today and saw a lovely one in Matalan, metal. Same routine, showing her, then asked her to try it herself and it bit her ! Ow ow she cries, her tip of finger had caught in the mechanism at the top. We put a plaster on.
Later that day I said shall I take the first one back and you keep the better one - No, she says, take back the new one .... ah dear, its hard sometimes - but she's a darling

Re: Dementia ....

My dad's in early stages, but refuses to believe he has difficulties. He thinks he's great. I've seen him go downhill over the last year or so. Thank goodness my mum's there to look after him. I make sure he attends all his health checks. He gets annoyed as he doesn't know why he has to get them in the first place. I took him for a brain scan and he thought he was going for an x-ray of his knee!! It's a sad disease of the mind . If they are pleasantly confused then that makes a difference. It's if they are tormented and demented - that is just awful. We're fortunate in that he is pleasantly confused for now.

Re: Dementia ....

This is a very cruel illness which takes away the very essence of the person that we knew. A very good friend is suffering from this, and combined with his Parkinsons it has left him virtually as helpless as a child and the man we knew is no longer recogniseable.

It's an absolute tragedy and my heart goes out to anyone either suffering from or coping with someone with this devastating illness.

Re: Dementia ....

Unfortunately, she is tormented by it, she hates being confused and is getting depression too. Its awful to see her like this - I'm at a loss with it, I can only be there for her and keep checking on her ......

Re: Dementia ....

Patsy, working in a ward, we have many dementia patients. It's so terribly sad and they are, like Alan said, the essence of the person they were. Gentle people can curse and shout. The family are at the end of their tether. Some patients constantly shout a repetetive word. Previously articulate people. It's so sad.

My dad isn't at that stage, but point blank refuses to go to the hospital clinic, or have someone visiting him. So he is going without medication he so obviously needs. We're at a loss what to do next.

Yes, god love anyone with relatives in the late stages of dementia.

Re: Dementia ....

My MIL has dementia but is still living in her own home. She is now more settled and less anxious than she was at first in the early stages. Then she was as you describe tormented by her inability to remember her everyday routine and how to work her washing machine or remember the names to familiar faces etc.
She kept saying 'what is happening to me' and she was in tears a lot of the time. She knew something was dreadfully wrong but she didn't know what. She was a nurse and midwife and she used to run a busy A&E and it was sad to hear her say "I've been diagnosed with dementia" but not know what it was.

Anyway the answer to the anxiety came partly with medication for depression and anxiety. She takes a hefty dose of Amitriptyline which seems to ease the anxiety quite well. It is important to discuss their symptoms like the anxiety with the GP and to get the dosage of medication right.

Also in some ways it's less stressful for them and for others when they have got past the stage of wondering what is going wrong and being very aware of it.

MY MIL is now more settled and she has even been persuaded to have someone come in to check she is taking her medication and eating etc.

She also has good support from family but not a primary carer.

Re: Dementia ....

I watched my mum slowly deteriorate with dementia. In the end she had forgotten almost her entire lifetime. It was so distressing towards the end.

Re: Dementia ....

I went through the same with my stepfather, his personality changed, he hated everyone apart from my mum but that could change from day to day.

When we visited his face dropped and he'd leave the room, by the time we were leaving he was laughing and saying how great we were and he'd like us to stay and take care of him and mum, touched my heart he did even though he was a short tempered person over the years and had no time for us kids, he just wanted mum to himself, caused a lot of upset and heartache for sure but we understood why..

Re: Dementia ....

Here on the Isle of Wight, Bear Grylls mother, Lady Sally Grylls was in hospital and worried about the problems the nurses had with patients with dementia. See this from the Island paper.
http://www.iwcp.co.uk/news/news/admi...way-59300.aspx

Re: Dementia ....

I just spoke to mum on the phone. We're going outfor Christmas lunch on Christmas day. My wee dad had his suit, shirt and tie laid out yesterday, thinking we were going last night. It makes me feel very sad.