18-08-2017, 12:21 AM
303
Re: Jokes for blokes
A man takes a lady out for dinner for the first time. Later, they go on to a show. The evening is a huge success and as he drops her at her door he says, "I have had a lovely time. You looked so beautiful, you remind me of a beautiful rambling rose. May I call on you tomorrow?" She agrees and a date is made.The next night he knocks on her door and when she opens it she slaps him hard across the face. He is stunned. "What was that for?" he asks.
She says, "I looked up rambling rose in the encyclopaedia last night and it said: 'Not well suited to bedding, but is excellent for rooting up against a garden wall'."
18-08-2017, 06:53 AM
304
Re: Jokes for blokes
Bob walked into a sports bar around 9:58 PM.He sat down next to a blonde at the bar
And stared up at the TV.
The 10 PM news was coming on.
The news crew was covering the story
Of a man on the ledge of a large building
Preparing to jump.
The blonde looked at Bob and said,
"Do you think he'll jump?"
Bob said,
"You know, I bet he'll jump."
The blonde replied,
"Well, I bet he won't."
Bob placed a $20 bill on the bar and said,
"You're on!"
Just as the blonde placed her money on the bar,
The guy on the ledge
Did a swan dive off the building,
Falling to his death.
The blonde was very upset,
But willingly handed her $20 to Bob.
"Fair's fair. Here's your money."
Bob replied,
"I can't take your money.
I saw this earlier on the 5 PM news,
So I knew he would jump."
The blonde replied,
"I did, too,
But I didn't think he'd do it again."
Bob took the money.
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