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devon56
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devon56 is offline
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13-12-2016, 10:45 PM
1

Not giving the wrong idea

One thing that my recent marital separation has given me is more time to do things.

There's a (single) lady who lives near to me whom I've known for a while.

We meet occasionally on the street and have the odd humorous exchange online but we've never had any further involvement.

I have no amorous intentions towards her but would like to know her more as a friend (and no more).

I am, however, a bit hesitant about inviting her for a drink or whatever in case she just sees me as some newly single bloke suddenly on the make.

How do I make the approach without giving the wrong idea?
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Mups
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13-12-2016, 10:48 PM
2

Re: Not giving the wrong idea

Tough one that, Devon. Do you get the impression she might like to be a little closer? Are you sure she's single?

Anyway, no good asking me, I always put my foot in it.

Good luck though.
devon56
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13-12-2016, 10:53 PM
3

Re: Not giving the wrong idea

Originally Posted by Mups ->
Do you get the impression she might like to be a little closer? Are you sure she's single?
I've no reason to feel she'd want to be a little closer - makes it even trickier if she does. Also yes, she is definitely single.
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13-12-2016, 10:56 PM
4

Re: Not giving the wrong idea

I am, however, a bit hesitant about inviting her for a drink or whatever in case she just sees me as some newly single bloke suddenly on the make.

How do I make the approach without giving the wrong idea?
Hi Devon try to find her interested and maybe invite her out for a daytime thing like coffee and cake or tea somewhere nice which can be less intimidating than an evening meet up.

You say she might get 'the wrong idea', if she does she does.
If you don't ask her out you will never know if you could have been friends so what have you to lose in asking
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13-12-2016, 11:06 PM
5

Re: Not giving the wrong idea

You say your recent separation...how recent is recent?
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13-12-2016, 11:07 PM
6

Re: Not giving the wrong idea

Forget women Devon, go out with your mates, women are so complicated, you always know where you are with a bloke....
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13-12-2016, 11:09 PM
7

Re: Not giving the wrong idea

Originally Posted by OldGreyFox ->
Forget women Devon, go out with your mates, women are so complicated, you always know where you are with a bloke....


You gotta be joking Mr. Fox!
ruthio
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13-12-2016, 11:10 PM
8

Re: Not giving the wrong idea

Originally Posted by OldGreyFox ->
Forget women Devon, go out with your mates, women are so complicated, you always know where you are with a bloke....
that's why we love 'em!
devon56
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13-12-2016, 11:15 PM
9

Re: Not giving the wrong idea

Originally Posted by ruthio ->
You say your recent separation...how recent is recent?
Two months ago.
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13-12-2016, 11:22 PM
10

Re: Not giving the wrong idea

Originally Posted by devon56 ->
Two months ago.
Oh heck! That's very recent then...tricky one.

If this woman knows about your very recent break, then I fear that any move on your part to a closer one-to-one friendship than the casual bumping into one another in the street scenario, will cause her to wonder...

My advice would be that for the moment wait until you "bump" again, and then be ready with an impromptu suggestion of coffee (or something).

Even that makes me a bit nervous...but as meg says, go for it.
Just the offer..."how about a coffee, if you're not in a hurry???"
 
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