Re: Feeling down

I am going to have to say or do something at work as the situation is just ridiculous and nobody bothers to talk to me or even try anymore.

I am thinking now that the Service Manager has said something to the Department Heads about me in one of her meetings that's either been put the wrong way, (wouldn't be the 1st time), or interpreted incorrectly, ditto.

Daily I get people coming up to me to ask me where my Manager is only to find out later that it was something that I can easily sort out and, in fact, I know more than the bloody Manager!

We have had a big staff turnover this year and a lot of the ones that took the time to try to communicate with me have left.

An example of what happens: - a cleaner stalks into the office dragging a vacuum behind her.

She does the usual "is M here?" then, when I said No she wants to plug-in the Vac so I show her the nearest plug.

She then turns it on, looks at me and "Hear that?!" to which I tell her that as I am deaf I can only hear a noise, nothing specific so if she could.........

She stalks off saying "I didn't think you were that deaf!"

There's another one - a carer who talks to me as if I am stupid or perhaps don't know English, she talks V-e-r-y s-l-o-w-l-y to me, with "OK?" used as punctuation.

Understandably, I get a bit impatient with this so I try to tell her I'm DEAF, not dimwitted, (like her!) but it goes nowhere, all I get then is "Where's M then?"


This week I have been very busy.
I have to work on my own and try to deal with everything myself because nobody understands that I sometimes need help communicating, except the residents who know me well.

A resident today really struggled to explain something to me and I really appreciated her patience because she has speech problems and I'm deaf!

I could have kissed her i was so grateful!

If the residents can go the extra mile for me, why can't the bloody staff?

Deafness is - apparently - the 3rd most common disability according to all Deaf Charities but you'd think I'd been lobotomised by the way I'm treated.

I hope nobody minds my putting all this down here.

I need to get this of my chest or I can get really down again.

Thanks! stevmk2

Re: Feeling down

I don't understand their attitude to you as I've said on here before I am now completely deaf and people I come in contact with treat me very well and show a lot of patience while talking to me, do you think it's just a fact they don't like you and don't want to bother with you (just a thought)

Re: Feeling down

In July, the senior manager, my manager and I had a meeting to discuss my needs.

All kinds of things were promised, none of which has happened.

What DOES happen is that when I've asked the senior manager, (as my manager does nothing!), about things I'm concerned about or are affecting me via email I never get a esponse.

If the senior manager also avoids speaking to me in the corridors.

The senior manager even had to ask HR if I actually qualified as a Disabled Employee in June when I first had serious hearing-related infections affecting my ability to function; I am profoundly deaf and can here nothing at all without my aids and it's been known this since 2011 when I applied for the job!

What I am saying is that despite all the nice, thoughtful -sounding measures my employer boasts about regarding Equal Opportunities and treatment for disabled employees it doesn't really happen because NOBODY has a clue.

Even though my employer's a Charity in the Disabled People's "sector" it's all just to satisfy their precious Rules & Regulations and get the Accolades and Certificates to stick in frames on the Reception walls.

Under their own Regulations a disabled employee, (one OFFICIALLY recognised as disabled by HR), who has a problem directly related to his / her disability are entitled to PAID time off from day 1 as opposed to a certain amount of paid sick leave minus the first 3 days.

THAT is where all this hinges because my employer has to pay me if I'm off if it's related to my hearing and the senior manager obviously dislikes that and instructed the accountant NOT to pay me for the first 3 days when I first had problems!

Up 'til June of this year I've had no real problems and any I did have I made arrangements to see hospitals or doctors on Fridays, my day off.

At work I get on with my job and I am not a great socialiser in the workplace because I grew up believing that if you were paid by your employer to work, that's what was the priority.
I've always been that way though because I was always a bit shy and not the gossipy type anyway.

At work, those that actually bother to try to communicate with me are fine but many of those have left and the majority now emulate the senior manager and avoid trying to communicate with me.

They truly do not understand what that does to me!

People in South Wales people are still obviously more understanding.

I lived in a small village in Pembrokeshire when I was young and I count that as one of the happiest times of my life so, in a way, I know people down there are more understanding.

Around here they do not seem able to tolerate deafness yet I've met people in Spain, Portugal and Cyprus on holidays that would put these people to shame.

You said "do you think it's just a fact they don't like you and don't want to bother with you" and it is precisely the second part - they do not want to bother with me.

Maybe I should go back to Wales........ stevmk2

Re: Feeling down

I understand what you are saying in the final part of your post, as you know I was born in a small mining village in the Rhondda valley and I still live in the same house I was born in 68 years ago so everybody in the village knows me and understands my predicament so what you say could well be right.
As for the first part of your post, to me you have obviously upset senior management by claiming you are disabled and they've now got it in for you by making your working life very uncomfortable do you think if you called this man aside (off the record) and told him how it's affecting you, what have you got to loose.

Re: Feeling down

My employer is a Charity, wishbone.

I availed myself of their stated policy and benefits on disabled employees at their insistence.

When I applied for the job, one stipulation in the Person Specification, under Desirable was to be a Disabled Person, which is why I applied.

My disability was not hidden and was obvious when I was interviewed by two people and consequently had to explain why I had to be close and be able to read the lips.

The only senior management that I have possibly upset is the Senior Manager by daring to suggest that I get the help and paid time-off stated clearly in their Disability Policy so, in other words, we are basically talking about bullying are we not?

I take it you no longer work so I should tell you that the treatment I get in the workplace is common to a large percentage of disabled employees, whether they are deaf or have some other debilitating condition.

All the Acts and Laws are meaningless because you cannot go up against Management and expect decent treatment these days because it is very rare in the workplace.

Just like whistle-blowing, you do NOT stick your neck out and complain because employers hire sophisticated legal assistance and those of us on the current Minimum wage or just above cannot get legal aid now thanks to a certain Government in 2011.

All I can do is plod-on and put up with it until I reach 65 and get my State Pension.

I had originally wanted to work on because I do really care for the residents where I work but the stress is just too much so, in September next year I will retire. stevmk2