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19-11-2017, 04:36 PM
3541

Re: Gumbud Leisurely Scribbles (part 5)

Jem,you DO realise we childers were duped,coz Santa's reindeer [Rangifer tarandus,to them wot's in the know] have antlers....on Christmas Eve...which is a month AFTER the males shed their antlers...hmmm?
Yuss,itstroo-them danged reindeer were all GURLIES! [which explains why it took all night to do a two-hour job] Only the female gurly-style reindeer even consider such anachronous [yeah,I said it!] items of apparel when navigating betwixt and between telephone wires,pylons,power-lines and satellite dishes on rooftops....huh....AZZIF! Right...umm...I'll just go puch a chicken...carry on...
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19-11-2017, 04:59 PM
3542

Re: Gumbud Leisurely Scribbles (part 5)

Originally Posted by Robert Jnr. View Post
Fruitcake, you are as barmy as the rest of us, welcome (you too Sweetie pie)
Oh, I thought I was as normal as the rest of you.

A quote from a filum series called The Tenth Kingdom. A local yokel has just done something silly. One of the heroes of the plot says to him, "You're a complete idiot!"
The local bridles and looks very upset, then replies, "If only!
Now my father, he were a complete idiot. I'm only a half-wit."


Originally Posted by Jem View Post
Be careful with that drill Fruity lad, they can become addictive, once you have the power in your hand you want to drill everything in sight, holes all over the place, you just can’t stop, my missus locks away my Black & Decker whenever it ends up in the house “There’ll be no holes drilled here by amateur drillers, you stick to you own game sunny jim”
Amateur drillers? she says it with such authority you’d swear you were going to drilling for oil.

There was once an old friend of mine who married a girl by the name of Josephine, she was a terror. Not long after they were married she came up to the local at lunch time one Saturday when he forgot to go home, God help him he was enjoying the craic, he worked very hard and seldom got out, she had his dinner covered with a large tea towel, she plonked the steaming hot plate of corned beef, cabbage, and mashed potatoes in front of him at our table “Eat that, and don’t expect any supper when you come home, I’ll be off with the girls having a night out, see ya in the morning if your lucky” then stormed out. I kid you not, a real brazen hussy.
Well you’d want to see yermans face, you could light a cigarette off it. Old regular Mickser Devlin looks at the knife and fork beside the meal then smiles at yerman then he quotes Josey Wales “Well are you gonna pull those pistols or whistle Dixie?”
Ever since that day all the lads called her Josey Wales, needless to say the marriage didn’t last long, I believe Josey is somewhere in Canada now, probably breaking in Moose on a ranch, she was one tough bird I can tell you.
Here’s a thought, who breaks in the Reindeers for Santa?
Ah well, it wasn't just any old drill you know. This was a SDS hammer drill, and I fitted a long hole that went right through the wall at the front of the house, intentional like.
My Lovely Cousin is quite happy for me to get my big boys toys out whenever I need them, except my arc-welder which I am banned from using, (but that's for health reasons.)
Mind you, she has come to expect perfection from me when I get my tools out, but alas I have made a rod for my own back. Well I've got an anvil and a big hammer you see so it wasn't that dicky-fult.
I now dread hearing the dreaded wurds when she utters them ...
I've had an idea, or
I've been thinking, or
Why don't we?

It inevitably means another job has been added to my long list of jobs to be jobbed, and the new job is always added at the top of the list of jobs to be jobbed. Consequently I then get told off for not finishing jobs lower down the list of jobs to be jobbed because the new job at the top of the list of jobs to be jobbed is of course a higher priority than the rest of the jobs on the list of jobs to be jobbed. *sigh*

I love her to bits though.

I have just crumbled by the way.

Right, there is just time for me to take my ankle grinder (that's not a spilling mastike, as anyone who has used one will know) to a pole before the dark arrives to cleanse the light.
The weather will change as soon as I have cut the pole off at its knees.
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19-11-2017, 06:54 PM
3543

Re: Gumbud Leisurely Scribbles (part 5)

Originally Posted by Pug View Post
Jem,you DO realise we childers were duped,coz Santa's reindeer [Rangifer tarandus,to them wot's in the know] have antlers....on Christmas Eve...which is a month AFTER the males shed their antlers...hmmm?
Yuss,itstroo-them danged reindeer were all GURLIES! [which explains why it took all night to do a two-hour job] Only the female gurly-style reindeer even consider such anachronous [yeah,I said it!] items of apparel when navigating betwixt and between telephone wires,pylons,power-lines and satellite dishes on rooftops....huh....AZZIF! Right...umm...I'll just go puch a chicken...carry on...
Good grief PUGGY, we agree on something. I was desiccated when I discovered the great deception FATHER CHRISTMAS.
Do folk still perpetrate this out of date urban myth?

Is it right to encourage children to welcome a fat unshaven old man into their bedroom & accept gifts from him, my case rests
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19-11-2017, 08:46 PM
3544

Re: Gumbud Leisurely Scribbles (part 5)

Originally Posted by Robert Jnr. View Post
Good grief PUGGY, we agree on something. I was desiccated when I discovered the great deception FATHER CHRISTMAS.
Do folk still perpetrate this out of date urban myth?

Is it right to encourage children to welcome a fat unshaven old man into their bedroom & accept gifts from him, my case rests
Oh, my!
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19-11-2017, 08:49 PM
3545

Re: Gumbud Leisurely Scribbles (part 5)

Remember that old Marx Brothers film when Chico was asked to fill in the sanity clause in his contract? “Ha! you canno fool me mister, everybody know there is no sanity claus”

I was watching Adam Faith in the film “What a Whopper” last night, what a terrible film, but he wasn’t a bad actor in his later years.
Did you know that when Adam Faith Died of a heart attack in 2003 his last words were, and I kid you not “Channel 5 is all shit isn’t it? Christ the crap they put on there, it’s a waste of space”
Strange dying words don’t you think.

2017, 14 years on and it hasn’t changed a bit, you were on the ball there Adam.
I always preferred him to Cliff Richard when I was a teenager, he was more down to earth, Cliff always struck me as a bit aloof.
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19-11-2017, 10:16 PM
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Re: Gumbud Leisurely Scribbles (part 5)

cliff - he was a plucker tryin to imitate elvis - one puff from elvis and he would have blown away. trouble with adam faith was he couldn't hold a note!

there was only one group that could take down elvis and it wasn't the rolling stones - no not the rubber lips!!

I was chattin to the lado last night and he was explaining that the grandkids were always askin him about snow - they have never experienced it only seen it on the fillums - he wants to take them to UK and let them experience it. then we chatted about the miracle of snow annd the first fall of the winter and the magic of it all - ahhhh!!
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19-11-2017, 10:21 PM
3547

Re: Gumbud Leisurely Scribbles (part 5)

Ok, there's Birds in here now, as well as Blokes, that is Ok, provided they act like blokes, if I remember right, we don't do Politics, or Female Emancipation.
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19-11-2017, 10:24 PM
3548

Re: Gumbud Leisurely Scribbles (part 5)

And, no Bra Burning, like toast, can have carcinogenic connotations.
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19-11-2017, 10:25 PM
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Re: Gumbud Leisurely Scribbles (part 5)

And C02.
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19-11-2017, 11:28 PM
3550

Re: Gumbud Leisurely Scribbles (part 5)

It's a bit Sparse, all things considered.
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