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Mondays child
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07-11-2017, 06:44 PM
11

Re: A very bleak mood...

Hi Ffosse.
Glad your in remission, brilliant news but obviously your illness and treatment has taxed your body, mind and soul somewhat.
Don't worry you will get stronger day by day and these short dark winter days will pass soon enough. Follow the good advice that people who know better than me give you here on the forum, as when I was at a very low ebb they were fantastic for me and helped me to start climbing out of my dark place.
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carol
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07-11-2017, 06:49 PM
12

Re: A very bleak mood...

Originally Posted by Ffosse ->

Thanks for the suggestions - I don't have a great network of friends or family on whom I can rely presently.

That's a shame because it would make a big difference.

All I can do is offer sympathy Ffosse. If it were me I'd ask the doctor for some medication that would make me sleep. Things tend to look better when you've slept well.

Maybe an antidepressant with side effects that cause tiredness to be taken at night - kill two birds with one stone.

People on here are always willing to listen. Keep posting.
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07-11-2017, 06:59 PM
13

Re: A very bleak mood...

Monday's child's post is proof that talking about it on here can help. Sometimes we argue, sometimes we joke around and be silly but when someone is in need we will help as much as is possible on a computer.

Take one day at a time Ffosse, as others have said, set a little goal for each day.

A dose of Nightnurse will help you sleep if you are allowed it.

LDs
deylon
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07-11-2017, 07:45 PM
14

Re: A very bleak mood...

So sorry you are feeling down,follow advice given you Im sure it will help ,do you have any friends you can talk to ? It helps I too feel low ,its the time of year.I have not been able to have my chemo infusion for about 6 weeks because I have had this eye problem & breathing difficulties ,so I worry in case the melanoma being teated will start to grow again
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07-11-2017, 08:25 PM
15

Re: A very bleak mood...

Dreamy I nearly missed this.
I did wonder why you were not posting.
I think this forum is VERY supportive for you.
Just post how you feel, it is a good way to start on the road to recovery.
You know where I am if you need me.
You are listened to on this forum.
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Ffosse
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08-11-2017, 01:08 AM
16

Re: A very bleak mood...

Feels like swimming in a dark pool of tadpoles yet I don't want to live anymore. I"ve given 55 year sv almost but nothing back.

I'm teaching imbeciles.
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08-11-2017, 01:10 AM
17

Re: A very bleak mood...

I know, will reply if I'm still here on Friday.
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08-11-2017, 01:54 AM
18

Re: A very bleak mood...

Ffosse Sorry to read that you feel bleak. I usually feel really down at this time of year because of the darkness. A close friend who has had chemo says it gives you "chemo brain" which means she finds it difficult to concentrate and remember things. I guess the combination of the dark season and the recovery from chemo, plus the overwhelming nature of remission must make it a sort of anti-climax which makes you introspective and blue.

In my case I know my Winter blues are chemical.

I too wake often in the middle of the night mainly because of pain from a frozen shoulder I've been battling this year. I take kalms which I find really help me nod off again. It's good to have people around but making peace with yourself is IMO crucial along with distraction from too much thinking.

If I have a really bad day (usually this happens in deep, dark midwinter for me), I try to let the bleakness wash over me like a wave hitting the beach and go to bed early.
swimfeeders
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08-11-2017, 05:29 AM
19

Re: A very bleak mood...

Hi

Most of us have been in a dark place in our lives.

However dark it is, you have to realise that you are you.

You deserve a life.

I was totally, utterly and completely in love with my Ex, the mother of my children.

Two hours after my heart attack I was gobsmacked to find out that it was not reciprocated.

Who will look after me now?

Off she went with a man she had been having an affair with for 11 years.

You have to have belief in yourself, you are the valuable person.

Life sometimes deals us bad cards, that does not mean what it is you who are fault, do not blame yourself.

Celebrate what you can do, not what you cannot.

I have always looked after my kids, nothing has ever stopped me doing that, until now.

My son has had his life destroyed by a pillock in Taiwan who has escaped justice and is gloating about it.

He is still putting pressure on.

Under normal circumstances, Dad would have been there and problem solved.

I cannot turn back what has happened, I would normally have ensured that it would not happen again.

There would have been a horrendous price to pay and a warning to others, leave well alone.

I am in a very dark place because I cannot do that at the moment.

I can however support my son in many ways and I celebrate that I can do so.

Look on the bright side, you are valuable, you are worth it.

Life sorts itself out.

Look after yourself.

I have six months of hard work to go to get fit again to go to Taiwan.

In the meantime, I support Guy in anyway I can.

I retain my sanity, not by getting depressed, but by realising it is transient.

My health will improve, then I will sort it.

He will not be touched again.
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08-11-2017, 07:51 AM
20

Re: A very bleak mood...

Originally Posted by Ffosse ->
I know, will reply if I'm still here on Friday.

 
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