Joke of the week

I work at a place in Chessington once a week and every week the guys and girls ask me for a joke! (Strange but true).

I trawl around and pick my favourite for them (then, when I remember I save them here).

Here are a few (contributions welcome, they must be short though, attention span issues )

My wife says I only have two faults.
I don't listen, and something else!

Apparently you can't use "beefstew" as a password.
It's not stroganoff.

A Brummie walks into a tailors, "Alroit mate, I'd like a 70's suit please." The tailor says, "Certainly sir, and would you like a kipper tie?" The Brummie says, "Thanks mate, white with two sugars please"

A pizza is basically a real time pie chart of how much pizza is left .

What did Sting get in Amsterdam?
A massage in a brothel.

Remember when plastic surgery was a taboo subject?
Now you mention Botox and nobody even raises an eyebrow!