31-10-2017, 05:07 PM
422
Re: Jokes for blokes
Two 90 year old men, Mike and Joe, have been friends all of their lives..When it's clear that Joe is dying, Mike visits him every day.
One day Mike says, 'Joe, we both loved rugby all our lives, and we played rugby on Saturdays together for so many years. Please do me one favour, when you get to Heaven, somehow you must let me know if there's rugby up there.'
Joe looks up at Mike from his death bed,' Mike, you've been my best friend for many years. If it's at all possible, I'll do this favour for you.
Shortly after that, Joe passes on.
At midnight a couple of nights later, Mike is awakened from a sound sleep by a blinding flash of white light and a voice calling out to him, 'Mike-Mike!'
'Who is it? asks Mike, sitting up suddenly. 'Who is it?'
'Mike-it's me, Joe.'
Where are you?'
'In heaven', replies Joe. 'I have some really good news and a little bad news.'
'Tell me the good news first,' says Mike.
'The good news,' Joe says, 'is that there's rugby in heaven. Better yet, all of our old friends who died before us are here, too. Better than that, we're all young again. Better still, it's always spring time and it never rains or snows. And best of all, we can play rugby all we want, and we never get tired.'
'That's fantastic,' says Mike. 'It's beyond my wildest dreams! So what's the bad news?'
'You're fly half on Tuesday'
31-10-2017, 05:16 PM
423
Re: Jokes for blokes
Originally Posted by Judd
->
Two 90 year old men, Mike and Joe, have been friends all of their lives.. When it's clear that Joe is dying, Mike visits him every day.
One day Mike says, 'Joe, we both loved rugby all our lives, and we played rugby on Saturdays together for so many years. Please do me one favour, when you get to Heaven, somehow you must let me know if there's rugby up there.'
Joe looks up at Mike from his death bed,' Mike, you've been my best friend for many years. If it's at all possible, I'll do this favour for you.
Shortly after that, Joe passes on.
At midnight a couple of nights later, Mike is awakened from a sound sleep by a blinding flash of white light and a voice calling out to him, 'Mike-Mike!'
'Who is it? asks Mike, sitting up suddenly. 'Who is it?'
'Mike-it's me, Joe.'
Where are you?'
'In heaven', replies Joe. 'I have some really good news and a little bad news.'
'Tell me the good news first,' says Mike.
'The good news,' Joe says, 'is that there's rugby in heaven. Better yet, all of our old friends who died before us are here, too. Better than that, we're all young again. Better still, it's always spring time and it never rains or snows. And best of all, we can play rugby all we want, and we never get tired.'
'That's fantastic,' says Mike. 'It's beyond my wildest dreams! So what's the bad news?'
'You're fly half on Tuesday'
01-11-2017, 11:16 AM
427
Re: Jokes for blokes
Originally Posted by bakerman
->
Beauty is in the eye of the beer-holder.
On a typical evening in the NAAFI, this gentleman would try his luck with one of the more sexually attractive women and... be rejected!
As time went on, and having consumed more beer, he'd lower his 'standards' and continue to be rejected until, at a sufficient level of inebriation, he'd try it on with the least attractive dog in the place and finally meet with success!
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