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Search: Posts Made By: Primus1
Forum: General Chat 28-07-2021, 09:14 PM
Replies: 71
Views: 2,015
Posted By Primus1
Maybe Peterís real, and youíre imaginary harbalÖ.

Maybe Peterís real, and youíre imaginary harbalÖ.
Forum: General Chat 28-07-2021, 06:41 PM
Replies: 75
Views: 2,412
Posted By Primus1
Oh I donít know, theyíve just found the back of a...

Oh I donít know, theyíve just found the back of a black hole, something Einstein predicted
Forum: General Chat 28-07-2021, 06:30 PM
Replies: 71
Views: 2,015
Posted By Primus1
I think you should pull him into your imaginary...

I think you should pull him into your imaginary office and give him a right carpeting,,
Forum: General Chat 28-07-2021, 06:26 PM
Replies: 35
Views: 1,280
Posted By Primus1
I donít think Iíve ever instantly disliked...

I donít think Iíve ever instantly disliked someone on the first meeting, it usually takes time for their personalities to come out, when I started this job , a couple of people seemed ok at first,...
Forum: General Chat 28-07-2021, 06:22 PM
Replies: 75
Views: 2,412
Posted By Primus1
A seven time formula one world champion possibly...

A seven time formula one world champion possibly number eight later this year, the most successful British driver of all time, but as heís British we like to build him up only to knock him downÖ
Forum: General Chat 28-07-2021, 06:20 PM
Replies: 75
Views: 2,412
Posted By Primus1
Donít forget Roland ratzenburger who also died...

Donít forget Roland ratzenburger who also died during qualifying that weekend, jules Bianchi died in 2015 after crashing into a tractor that was removing a stricken car that had gone off in the wet,...
Forum: General Chat 26-07-2021, 10:05 PM
Replies: 160
Views: 3,113
Posted By Primus1
Itís very important to have clean underwear when...

Itís very important to have clean underwear when taking off your trousers in someoneís home, remember what your motherís told youÖ..
Forum: Jokes & Funnies 25-07-2021, 05:31 PM
Replies: 2,458
Views: 133,425
Posted By Primus1
Just asked a homeless woman if I could take her...

Just asked a homeless woman if I could take her home. She smiled and said yesÖ

You should have seen the look on her face when I ran off with her cardboard box!
Forum: Jokes & Funnies 25-07-2021, 05:30 PM
Replies: 2,458
Views: 133,425
Posted By Primus1
Managed to get a girl from the club back to my...

Managed to get a girl from the club back to my house last night, by telling her I was an Olympic gold medal winner...

"Wow, that's amazing!" she said, lifting it from its stand on the mantelpiece....
Forum: Music 25-07-2021, 04:56 PM
Replies: 30
Views: 717
Posted By Primus1
I like all the songs from the jb films, the best...

I like all the songs from the jb films, the best has to be the original James Bond theme, so distinctive you know exactly what it is from the opening few bars,
Forum: General Chat 25-07-2021, 12:22 PM
Replies: 25
Views: 591
Posted By Primus1
Many happy returns bathsheba, hope you have a...

Many happy returns bathsheba, hope you have a lovely day🎂
Forum: General Chat 25-07-2021, 10:49 AM
Replies: 83
Views: 2,796
Posted By Primus1
Yes but does that mean that an academic is...

Yes but does that mean that an academic is superior to a cleaner say..?
Forum: General Chat 25-07-2021, 10:47 AM
Replies: 83
Views: 2,796
Posted By Primus1
Exactly Meg, itís just that people donít often...

Exactly Meg, itís just that people donít often realise how important some of these so called menial jobs are.
Forum: General Chat 25-07-2021, 09:55 AM
Replies: 83
Views: 2,796
Posted By Primus1
Thatís the thing though carol, you got to know...

Thatís the thing though carol, you got to know them, many people would assume that someone being a dr, must be a better person because of that, without getting to know them, once they did, they might...
Forum: General Chat 25-07-2021, 09:28 AM
Replies: 83
Views: 2,796
Posted By Primus1
Why do we judge

People by the jobs they do..?, Iím sure weíve all met someone at a social gathering and inevitably the conversation comes round to ď and what do you doĒ ?
Does the answer then determine how we treat...
Forum: Jokes & Funnies 23-07-2021, 10:10 PM
Replies: 2,458
Views: 133,425
Posted By Primus1
So I'm straining on the toilet, pushing as hard...

So I'm straining on the toilet, pushing as hard as I can, when I hear a popping sound and it suddenly went dark.

My wife shouted, "Darling, are you alright? We've had a power cut."

I replied,...
Forum: General Chat 22-07-2021, 10:10 PM
Replies: 15
Views: 587
Posted By Primus1
Yes but I got the side with the hole in them , I...

Yes but I got the side with the hole in them , I was recognised, unfortunately, I sang like a canary, telling them you are the ringleader and I was just a hapless bystander, expect a knock at the...
Forum: Sports 22-07-2021, 07:09 PM
Replies: 47
Views: 1,487
Posted By Primus1
Max and lewis were side by side going into copse,...

Max and lewis were side by side going into copse, lewis slightly missed his apex and max turned in on him because he didnít expect him to be there, both drivers werenít backing down, lewis got the...
Forum: General Chat 22-07-2021, 07:28 AM
Replies: 15
Views: 587
Posted By Primus1
You were on your mobile IN the bank and the...

You were on your mobile IN the bank and the advisor was right behind you:lol:

Senile old buggerÖ:lol::lol::lol:
Forum: Jokes & Funnies 21-07-2021, 10:19 PM
Replies: 2,458
Views: 133,425
Posted By Primus1
Just met the local Glasgow mafia boss... He...

Just met the local Glasgow mafia boss...

He made me an offer I couldn't understand!
Forum: General Chat 21-07-2021, 10:09 PM
Replies: 78
Views: 1,852
Posted By Primus1
Need your windscreen cleaning mister..?

Need your windscreen cleaning mister..?
Forum: General Chat 21-07-2021, 10:05 PM
Replies: 34
Views: 1,047
Posted By Primus1
If I said you had a beautiful body ÖÖ ...

If I said you had a beautiful body ÖÖ



Would you take all your clothes off and show meÖ?
Forum: Food & Drink 21-07-2021, 06:07 PM
Replies: 16
Views: 638
Posted By Primus1
Pimms is lovely, but it is very potent, donít mix...

Pimms is lovely, but it is very potent, donít mix it too strong, you can put whatever you like in it, a few mint leaves, cucumber, anything, if you buy some frozen fruit, it saves using ice cubes,...
Forum: Sports 21-07-2021, 06:02 PM
Replies: 47
Views: 1,487
Posted By Primus1
Afaik, Hamilton and max were side by side ( more...

Afaik, Hamilton and max were side by side ( more or less) lewis didnít run into the back of him, max turned in on him, but neither were prepared to give ground, both were vying for the same piece of...
Forum: Sports 21-07-2021, 07:27 AM
Replies: 47
Views: 1,487
Posted By Primus1
Well the stewards deemed Hamilton was at fault...

Well the stewards deemed Hamilton was at fault and awarded a penalty accordingly, but as the great ayrton senna said
ď if you no longer go for a gap that is there, then you are no longer a racing...
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