Re: Leisurely Scribbles (part 5)

A Park Ranger is not the most popular of jobs
Cleaning up dog shit left by the yobs
You won’t hear them sing or even whistle
Might yell though, if one sat on a thistle
Call them nasty or call them mean
But it’s all for our health and hygiene.

Re: Leisurely Scribbles (part 5)

I wrote a hilarious poem in reply
but due to circumstance the time has passed.
I'm not writing that thing all over again.
...to be honest,I just can't be arsed....

Re: Leisurely Scribbles (part 5)

Nowt wrong with that sentiment, Imo.

Re: Leisurely Scribbles (part 5)

That's a pity Pug, I would have loved to have read it.

I see the ads for the ‘Circulation Booster’ are back on daytime TV again, the missus bought one of these white elephants a few years back, not a sausage of good did it do her, she was sitting down on the armchair night after night with her hooves stuck on it and not a bit of difference did it make to her circulation, I told her if she wanted circulation she’d be better off doing a simple exercise every day, so she’s been doing the leg kicking exercise for the past year and she’s 100% better for it, (kicking each leg up 10 times while lying on the bed before she gets up in the mornings) and the circulation booster got dumped up the attic somewhere, so all you oldies don’t be fooled by the ads, keep your few bob in your pocket/purse, use your own power to get the blood moving through the body, kick start yourself every morning.

Re: Leisurely Scribbles (part 5)

Well,the answer I wrote was to do with dog poo.
Coz having a dump is just something dogs do
They don't have dog-society telling them 'NO'
So they find a nice spot,they crouch down and let go.

Ok,it's annoying and it's embarrassing too.
You holding the lead while your dog has a poo
Any everyone passing is glaring at YOU
But,what the Hell am I supposed to do?

He finishes,'wheelspins' and off he then sets
But you're dying of shame from the comments it gets
As you whip out the Dog-Poo-Bag from under your jacket
And gingerly try getting it all as you pack it

Without getting your fingers too close to the pile
Yet townies throw fridges in ditches all the while
And as YOU fervently pray the poo-bag won't rip
Yet another townie pulls up to fly-tip!

I know it's now common to see dogshit in trees
Little bags of dog poo that swing in the breeze
But when facing down a fly-tipper,bet your arse I'll say
"LEAVE the dogshit-take your F#KING fridge away!"

One-or-two 'hard men' have at times become physical
[As if THAT'S going to make me back down]
And each time it's ended with a plank from That London
Taking his shit broken fridge back to town.

So yes,my pooches will stop for a crap
'N' yes,it's always when townies can see.
But they can f#ck off if they get 'in my face'
....because I OWN this island,y'see!

Re: Leisurely Scribbles (part 5)

Excellent Pug!, that was my laugh of the month, a true classic up there with the best, it would have been a disaster if that had not reached the scribblers page, well done mate!



I wonder how RJ, Gumbud, Solo and the rest of them are keeping this weather, haven't heard from them for a while now, they would enjoy that too, so many old members seem to be going off the map lately, this old place has certainly changed.

Re: Leisurely Scribbles (part 5)

Yes,it's true,Jem...you know you're becoming officially old,when herself tells you she has a bun in the oven-and you know it means there'll be cake for tea! Ohhh,boy-I'm most definitely ancient now-both in outlook and in body. [well,I say 'body'-I refer to this battered relic my mind uses as a home]
Just yesterday I was given Tramadol & Arcoxia,to help fight the crippling pain from this B#ASTARD fibromyalgia. Doc says I'm a fool to myself and should give in to it,as it's here for life. I say SOD that idea-last one into the box is a wimp! But,in truth,it's just part of being me. Past injuries catching up,past activities demanding payment.....oh,BOY I'm becoming battered & tatty. Doc actually said to me "Pug,you should become an entertainer. Your autobiography would be a best-seller". Honestly. FFS...I've been bashed,battered,bombed,blown up,shot [twice] stabbed [also twice] and had more petrol thrown at me than The Gulf produces in a year...and I'm still here-stone the crows,I'm old!
In fact,I'm SO old that the very first words anyone ever said to me were...
"Better cover your ears,Pug-there's going to be a Big Bang,any moment now!"

Re: Leisurely Scribbles (part 5)

That may just be a Theory.

Re: Leisurely Scribbles (part 5)

I think there has been a Troll Cull, or a Walkout, it is good to see the Rule of Foot is alive and kicking.

Re: Leisurely Scribbles (part 5)

Seems you've been in more scrapes than Batman Pug, ah well you survived and your still here in good spirits, that is to be commended.

I was looking at a program on BBC4 last night, I didn't see the whole of it, it was all about the Boy Scout Movement and it's founder Baden Powell, his book title "Scouting for Boys" might cause a few eyebrows to raise these days but back in the days when being gay meant you were feeling happy it was very acceptable. I have never been a Boy Scout although the missus used to be a very eager Brownie in her girlie days, I used to think a Brownie was some kind of fruit cake, turned out I wasn't that far off, she was quite a wild one back then, still is come to think of it.
I found the program interesting and nostalgic, all innocent fun and frolics in the woods, setting up camp for the night and how to sink the tent pegs properly, singing at campfires with naked flames shooting into the air, kids with sharp knives whittling away on lumps of wood without gloves and safety goggles, health and safety would be in a panic if they watched it.
Baden's grandson was interviewed and he was as batty as his old grandad, but a nice happy fellow.