31-07-2013, 04:45 PM
51
Re: More of my uncle Vivian's adventures.
PatsCGI just noticed you're in KEnt. AS a young man I spent many weeks staying with friends in DEAL.
It was always cold & windy, but compensated by the abundance of pubs there,one on every corner it seemed & always heaving with happy drinkers, such a contrast to the cold outside
I think DEal had the longest pier in the UK in the 1960s.
WHen Dads army first appeared I thought of DEal & Walmer castle.
THe folks I stayed with were very hospitable & served up lashings of vegetable grown in their garden. The family had all been miners before retiring.
04-08-2013, 09:40 AM
53
Re: More of my uncle Vivian's adventures.
Uncle Vivian was a very ordinary chap really & he regretted the way the Paparazzi had hounded him ,down the years .From the time he reversed his car into the giant ring of stones known as STONEHENGE, causing them to fall over like dominoes to the time he left off his handbrake on his beautiful new Rolls Royce motor car leading to it toppling over the dock walls.Uncle Vivian spent some time as a Department Store buyer, an environment which suited his mercurial manner. He could snarl, charm, convince & other ways to dominate his business associates. He oncw decided that ALL of his suppliers were overcharging him by 10%, so he knocked off 10% off of all invoices sent to him.
Chaos reigned as supplier after supplier challenged him, with held deliveries & counterclaimed their monies.
One day a queue was forming outside his office, the door was ajar while uncle Vivian shouted abuse into a telephone hand set.
“You’re nothing but a tight fisted, shite shovelling, snidy nosed ,orphaned, meally mouthed, back stabbing, fat arsed, excuse of a man.
The tirade went on until uncle ran out of breath. The queue, reminiscent of the reaction Jesus defence of the about to be stoned woman caused. That is to say “Let he who amongst you has not sinned throw the first stone”
Uncle’s wide ranging terms of abuse had frightened the queue so much that the complainants had disappeared, one by one.
Just then , Florrie the harradian & malevolent cleaner popped her head round the office door. Uncle felt around in his pockets,
“HOw about a quick one Flo” he put his his index finger to his lips shushed her and produced a hip flask containing 12 year old whiskey.
“Say when “
05-08-2013, 05:21 PM
55
Re: More of my uncle Vivian's adventures.
Uncle Vivian was a kind hearted soul, but he wasn’t very prone to using his head on these heart-warming occasions when some thing has pulled at his heart strings.I learned as a child that he had interest and knowledge about homeless horses & dogs. I loved going out with him as a child. He would leave me outside the charity shops in my pushchair while he went into the shop to donate money for the care of horses & dogs. Sometimes he’d be given some of the money back. Good old Vivian wasted no time in reinvesting it. Again.
When I was a bit older he took me to the football match in our locale. I couldn’t see much of what was going on because he stood in front of me. Stoically I put it down to uncle’s excitement. I held on like glue to the back of his old Naval jacket. To my surprise ,after the match had finished I saw uncle looking very worried in the distance. That was strange for I thought I was next to him, holding on to his coat. I looked up , but it wasn’t uncle Vivian’s coat I was holding on to. Uncle lost me as soon as we entered the grounds.
The speedway was the same, he lost me. My parents must have been very naïve to put uncle Vivian in charge of me.
Next time I will write some more about his adventures in the Kalahari desert & how his photographic memory saved and command of Swahili saved him and the travelling players “The good companions” from the cooking pot.
10-08-2013, 11:36 AM
59
Re: More of my uncle Vivian's adventures.
My Fathers brother, uncle Hector, dabbled in mountaineering and photography and had many adventures in the himalayas, sadly most of his documents didn't survive.I have heard my Father talk of the great postal mislayment early in the last century where thousands of documents and photo's disappeared without trace including a priceless photograph by uncle Hector of the abominable snowman and his wife having sex in the snow in an unbelievable position, what a great loss to humanity that was, not to mention the News of The World.
10-08-2013, 05:11 PM
60
Re: More of my uncle Vivian's adventures.
Originally Posted by Jem
->
My Fathers brother, uncle Hector, dabbled in mountaineering and photography and had many adventures in the himalayas, sadly most of his documents didn't survive.I have heard my Father talk of the great postal mislayment early in the last century where thousands of documents and photo's disappeared without trace including a priceless photograph by uncle Hector of the abominable snowman and his wife having sex in the snow in an unbelievable position, what a great loss to humanity that was, not to mention the News of The World.
Specifically .Was the Ab Snowman having sex with his wife or Hectors wife, it's not very clear. As for the unbelievable coital position I believe the photo was printed back to front & upside down in error. This may also explain the reason for their gurning.
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