09-11-2014, 01:36 PM
51
Re: The elderly don't need handling with kid gloves!
Originally Posted by carol
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Doesn't he have any endearment at all for you?I think that's a shame...
09-11-2014, 02:57 PM
53
Re: The elderly don't need handling with kid gloves!
Originally Posted by Julie1962
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Oh my goodness I hope we never grow out of it, loving each other and endearments go hand in hand for us. Many things we have grown out of like minor arguments but never calling each other pet names.
09-11-2014, 03:04 PM
54
Re: The elderly don't need handling with kid gloves!
Originally Posted by Julie1962
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Oh my goodness I hope we never grow out of it, loving each other and endearments go hand in hand for us. Many things we have grown out of like minor arguments but never calling each other pet names.
As we have tolerated each other for 45 years, I don't think we have done too badly.
I won't pretend I feel the same about my husband since his illness, because I don't. It was his high intelligence that attracted me to him in the first place, and now he only has half a functioning brain, it isn't quite the same. But we get by doing our own thing and not spending too much time in each other's company. We just meet up during the day for morning coffee, lunch and then our evening meal during which we watch the TV. It might not suit others but it suits us, as that is what we have always done having nothing in common apart from our children.
09-11-2014, 03:10 PM
55
Re: The elderly don't need handling with kid gloves!
You are being very upfront and forthright Comeandgo. I'm sure there will be many others in your position. Just tolerating each other, because it's easier than walking out? I look at some couples and wonder why they are still with each other. They can hardly say a good word about each other, which is incredibly sad.If you are both "happy enough", living like brother and sister, well that's your business. I'm sure you won't be the only ones. I do think it's a shame about your husband's illness. He didn't choose to end up like this. In sickness and in health..........................
09-11-2014, 03:17 PM
56
Re: The elderly don't need handling with kid gloves!
Originally Posted by alice76
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You are being very upfront and forthright Comeandgo. I'm sure there will be many others in your position. Just tolerating each other, because it's easier than walking out? I look at some couples and wonder why they are still with each other. They can hardly say a good word about each other, which is incredibly sad. If you are both "happy enough", living like brother and sister, well that's your business. I'm sure you won't be the only ones. I do think it's a shame about your husband's illness. He didn't choose to end up like this. In sickness and in health..........................
09-11-2014, 03:19 PM
57
Re: The elderly don't need handling with kid gloves!
Originally Posted by comeandgo
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Each to their own, whatever turns you on.As we have tolerated each other for 45 years, I don't think we have done too badly.
I won't pretend I feel the same about my husband since his illness, because I don't. It was his high intelligence that attracted me to him in the first place, and now he only has half a functioning brain, it isn't quite the same. But we get by doing our own thing and not spending too much time in each other's company. We just meet up during the day for morning coffee, lunch and then our evening meal during which we watch the TV. It might not suit others but it suits us, as that is what we have always done having nothing in common apart from our children.
09-11-2014, 03:22 PM
58
Re: The elderly don't need handling with kid gloves!
My missus calls everyone 'Love' old and young and she never had any complaints.I don’t know what all the fuss is about when you think of the names we called the older people when we were young, ‘Old Crone’ ‘Old Brick’ ‘Old Hag’ ‘Old sour puss’ and when someone had lots of wrinkles ‘Old Ripple face’, there were lots more I can’t think of off hand but we were no angels and what goes round comes round, as far as I'm concerned they can call me what they like I don't take offence, if some of the things they call you to your face upsets you, you would freak out if you heard what they call you behind your back.
Why is it that every generation thinks their generation is the it and all of everything.
09-11-2014, 03:23 PM
59
Re: The elderly don't need handling with kid gloves!
When my husband had a stroke he changed had to learn to do so much again and then I learned to love the new normal because he is never going to be the same person he was. I think in many ways I love the new normal more than the old one.I can't say exactly what attracted me to him as he has always had aspergers so some challenging times have been had but his kindness is high on the list and luckily he has never lost that.
Tolerating someone isn't something I would like to live with, we of course have tolerance but deep loving is most important.
09-11-2014, 03:26 PM
60
Re: The elderly don't need handling with kid gloves!
Originally Posted by comeandgo
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I would NEVER consider walking out, our life suits us that is what we signed up to when I was 19 and he was 22. I wouldn't want it any different apart from my husband having a fully functioning brain again. I don't think anyone would describe us as like brother and sister either!
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