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Are you lonesome tonight
is your bra strap too tight
are your corsets just drifting apart
have you got a big chest
making holes in your vest
does your spare tyre
reach out into the night
are your stockings all laddered
are you wearing them thin
do you hold up your knickers
with a big safety pin
are your false teeth all worn
do they drop when you yawn
well its no wonder your lonesome tonight
A girl visits her doctor and tells him she has a terrible discharge.
"Okay, take your knickers off spread your legs and lets check it out" he says.
She drops her knickers opens her legs and he has a good feel around.
He says "how does that feel?"
She says "Wonderful, but the discharge is from my ear".