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Willow
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06-04-2013, 12:24 PM
61

Re: What is your definition of love?

[B]Some might call it love and others may call it a sense of duty and why was your Dad lying underneath your mum to clean her bottom? That must be the most awkward way to clean someone up. And why did you peer through the letterbox instead of knocking the door? Sorry but both of those things sound bizarre to me.[/B

That is really freaky!
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ben-varrey
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06-04-2013, 12:31 PM
62

Re: What is your definition of love?

Originally Posted by Willow ->
That is really freaky!
Isn't it just!
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Mags
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06-04-2013, 12:50 PM
63

Re: What is your definition of love?

Originally Posted by Wrinkly ->
Couldn't agree more Michael, I too couldn't believe what they said about their parents, usually because they were not good children that they do this.
I got smacked and belted by my parents when a child, I used to moan when later in life I had to be in at certain times etc.
Why did they do it? because they loved me, they made me what I am which I believe to be loving and kind.
Oh Arthur, you are so wrong there Bad behaviour by children has nothing to do with it. I knew no love from my mother, I have no recollection of ever having a kiss or cuddle from her throughout my childhood or adult life. It was almost as if I didn't exist to her. When I reached my teenage years I made a vow to myself that if ever I was fortunate enough to have children of my own, I would shower them with the love I didn't receive. To this day, I have two well adjusted loving children and grandchildren who never fail to smother me with kisses I feel I have done my bit to show you can turn life around.

I didn't hate my mother, I didn't know any different at the time but I still respected her. However, when she suffered her three strokes in later life and was a shadow of the person she used to be, I used to visit her every day .... I gave her a cuddle and a kiss on the cheek at every visit but it made me feel very uncomfortable doing so as I had never had any contact like that with her before.

We live and learn as they say....
Patsy
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06-04-2013, 12:50 PM
64

Re: What is your definition of love?

Thanks so much for your post Karen - just to hear someone simply say, that not 'all' Mothers are wonderful and nurturing, as they should be. My Mothers attempt at abortion, did not work with me, but it left complications with my health - I have never once thrown any of the past into her face, never once complained. In fact protected her from my ordeals. But, she just never wanted me, that was made clear - what can you do in a situation like that ! Anyway its nice to get support, so thankyou....
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06-04-2013, 12:54 PM
65

Re: What is your definition of love?

Your post makes absolute sense to me Mags. I would never misbehave, because I wanted my Mother to love me but nothing could make that happen... You have my respect ... Pats
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06-04-2013, 12:55 PM
66

Re: What is your definition of love?

You are very welcome Pats - as you know, my mother and I don't always see eye to eye and that is 100% her fault - she was loving and I was well looked after but she never missed an opportunity to be unkind towards me (with words) - that has now come back to haunt her. I can't believe people can blame a child for the bad behavour of an adult. Truly bizarre.
Julie1962
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06-04-2013, 01:34 PM
67

Re: What is your definition of love?

Originally Posted by ben-varrey ->
You are very welcome Pats - as you know, my mother and I don't always see eye to eye and that is 100% her fault - she was loving and I was well looked after but she never missed an opportunity to be unkind towards me (with words) - that has now come back to haunt her. I can't believe people can blame a child for the bad behavour of an adult. Truly bizarre.
I agree, it took years for me to understand it wasn't my fault my parents preferred drink/drugs to being my mum and dad. No way can a child be at fault and cause a parent to hit them, the adult should be in control of themselves and behave as an adult not stoop to the level of a child and hit out in anger.
 
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