15-12-2016, 07:36 AM
1
A Catastrophic Christmas Tale !
A little story from a year or two ago !A CATASTROPHIC CHRISTMAS TALE !
I have always been daft about Christmas – it sends me quite childlike with excitement. I enjoy all the frantic shopping, and baking, and writing of cards but most of all, I love Christmas Trees. Real ones, of course, and the taller the better – I am convinced that they are magick. Unfortunately my cat, Merlin, does not share my enthusiasm – in fact he hates them!
Ever since his early kittenhood, when he made the mistake of trying to climb one and ended up looking like a small green porcupine, screeching to the world that it “Bit him and if it did it again he would kill it stone dead !”, he has hated all Christmas Trees.
Every year I promise myself that I will find somewhere else to put it, but every year it ends up in the dining room – which Merlin regards as his own personal domain – so every year there is a fight. Last year, for example, the minute the tree arrived he began crawling around on his stomach, bawling threats from under the sideboard and spitting at anyone who spoke to him. I fixed the tree firmly in its tub and went upstairs in search of the lights and decorations.
There was a sickening crash – the dining-room carpet was covered in soil and pine needles, the tree cowered in a mangled heap beside its overturned tub………and Merlin ? He was very busy on the kitchen windowsill talking to the birds. “It wasn’t his fault if the stupid tree fainted was it ? He was only patting it to make it feel welcome !”.
Having cleaned up and replanted the tree, I carefully tested all the lights before arranging them in the branches, then came the glass balls, then the bells, then the tinsel – then came a large tabby paw – instant mayhem ! I swore at him, he spat at me, and things might have turned quite nasty if a friend had not chosen that moment to remind me that it was the season of goodwill to all – even cats ! Muttering that THAT cat would make Machiavelli look like a saint, I went off to make some coffee. There was a sickening crash – the dining room carpet was covered in soil, pine needles, tinsel, and broken glass – and Merlin ? he was sitting by the bedroom fire, “Noisy things Christmas Trees”, he said, “Cannot have a decent catnap anywhere today !”.
Having cleaned up (again) and replanted the now rather battered looking tree, rearranged the surviving balls and tinsel – I discovered that the lights would not work. It was not until I walked around the tree at least four times, checking every wretched light bulb, that I noticed the teeth mark through the flex – and Merlin ? He was sitting on the sideboard making rude remarks about the Angel on the tree top. Now, Angels are normally very good about that sort of thing – but this one had had a very trying day and she let that cat have a few home truths ! Before I could stop him Merlin sprang – and for a few dizzy moments I had 1 1/4 stone of hissing, spitting, tabby hanging from the tree top by his whiskers, vowing that “He ate Angels - for breakfast !”,- there was a sickening crash……
But I am sure you’ve got the picture. I still have nightmares about Christmas Trees cringing in terror, as giant tabby cats pursue the Herald Angels, who don’t seem to be singing very much at all !
Ah well, just a few short weeks and it will all begin again.
Footnote:
My beloved Merlin is no longer with me – he went to the Summerlands on 2nd October, 1993, aged 21 years – may he dream for ever in the sunlight and may the Gods enjoy his company as much as I did.
15-12-2016, 05:30 PM
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Re: A Catastrophic Christmas Tale !
What a great true story Silver Tabby!
I have a few stories like that myself..... Like the time my young kitten must have escaped from the house when I opened the door. It was dark and I was out with a torch shouting Katy, but she didn't respond. Almost in tears I returned to the lounge to notice a strange fluffy decoration on my Christmas tree. On closer inspection I discovered Katy curled around the tree trunk , fast asleep and supported by the branches! 
15-12-2016, 07:19 PM
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Re: A Catastrophic Christmas Tale !
Loved the story Tabby , very funny !
My whippet Mabel has always been very naughty . One year we went out on New Years day ( so the tree had been up quite a while )
I had a couple of decorations which were very important to me . One was a 1960's elf . I put it near the top of the tree .
When we came back Mabel had chewed up one decoration from the tree . The 1960's elf . Only its head remained .
Just how she did it I'll never know . I did see the funny side of it . With Mabel you always have to laugh !
17-12-2016, 03:50 PM
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Re: A Catastrophic Christmas Tale !
Perhaps this link may make yo feel your not alone. ST.Owners have shared their hilarious examples of feline troublemaking online
Grey kitten was so enthusiastic at attacking Christmas tree she knocked it over
In another amusing video, black cat climbs to the top of a tree and has a sit down
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/arti...ve-spirit.html
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