Re: Leisurely Scribbles (part 5)

I honestly couldn’t tell you Spitty, I’ve never seen duck do, I’ve seen plenty of chicken do, cow do, dog do, horse do too, but no duck do, maybe they do it in the water that’s why we never see it.
What was that very old song now, I can only remember two lines of it.

“If all the young maidens were ducks in the water
All the young men would come jumping in after”

Ducks chickens and now doors, I really do love old solid doors. RJ used to have his special place to go to when he felt low, he called it “Greendor” If your there now RJ here’s a question for you.
Which came first the door or the gate?
We are told there are pearly gates at heaven’s entrance, gates mind you not doors, when one gets pass the gates is one then led up to the door?
We know cavemen had no doors on their caves, so when were doors first mentioned in the ancient scripts?
When Adam and Eve were expelled from the garden of Eden, were they shown the door or the gate?

They have yet to find a more durable substitute for the door we know and love for thousands of years now. I cannot see these aluminium doors lasting a fraction as long as the old solid wooden doors you see in old castles and churches, absolute works of art in their own right.
I made a calculation and found that if you opened and shut your various doors 180 times a day, and if you were doing it since the day you were born until you died at 100 years of age, you would still be a long way off half a million times, 365,800 times to be exact. Hows that for useless information.

“In Kerala, India, this temple has an unopened door surrounded by sacred mystery. Legends say this door can only be opened by correctly chanting the Garuda Mantra. Without bolts or latches of any visible kind, the sealed doorway is protected by two stone cobras.
If the door is opened by means other than the right sound waves of the chant, catastrophe will be unleashed, of an apocalyptic nature, not only over India, but the whole world. Sounds like the perfect Indiana Jones or Lara Croft film plot”

“Close the door they’re coming through the windows” Quote from the original film “Night of the Living Dead”

Re: Leisurely Scribbles (part 5)

The wife likes to look up the agony columns on the net, she came across this one sent in to an agony aunt in Australia, so I copied it to let you see it, cos I know you never believe me.
It certainly does take all sorts to make a World, and as they say “As God makes them he matches them”. He sleeps while she makes love to an imaginary man she sees on his belly, how weird is that?

Re: Leisurely Scribbles (part 5)

I have discovered a whole new meaning to 'just catching my breath'...but I see normal service returning slowly but surely .

You learn a lot with those agony columns..remember Marjorie Proops! There apparently wasn't anything she could not solve for you if you only had the courage to ask her...using a pseudonym of course. Old Proopsie had her own private living agony so I suppose she was qualified somewhat to give advice....but you do wonder !

There have been many since dear Marje but none quite cut the mustard but copy cats rarely do

https://www.heraldscotland.com/news/...e-proops-dies/

Re: Leisurely Scribbles (part 5)

Jem, just read, Christopher is dead, choked on a ball of Fluff.

Re: Leisurely Scribbles (part 5)

God rest his soul, what a way to go, navel gazed to death.

People can and do get up to the most peculiar things in the privacy of their own homes/bedrooms, and of course there are the occasional accidents, if one is inclined to go in for sexual adventures of a third kind and go where no man has gone before, one should be extremely careful.
There is an old retired ambulance fireman who drinks with us and the tales he tells would make the hair stand up on your head, I kid you not.
However they would be too upsetting to post on here.

I was never keen on navels anyway, nor ears, personally I think ears are the ugliest part of the human head, fleshy cauliflowers plonked at the side of the head.
When God made the world they say it took 7 days, it took another 7 days for God to make Adam, mainly because he had these two ears left over and couldn’t make up his mind where to put them, finally he just gave up and stuck them on the side of Adam’s nopper.

Re: Leisurely Scribbles (part 5)

Ah so poor old Marjorie had her own cross to carry. I have to admit that as a very young man I often glimpsed into her column, strictly to further my sex education you understand, nobody told us nothing back then, we had to find out the hard way and then it was too late, we were hooked lined and sinkered for life.

Whatever happened to the “Man in the Street”? Did the BBC make him redundant? or was he knocked down by the political correctness bus, taken to hospital and the “Man” bit removed?
Us old gentlemen would never say the “Woman in the Street” as that might be mistaken for something completely different, and God knows we had enough unfortunate young women on the Streets back then.

The Man in the Street has long since gone
His opinion was valued whether right or wrong
There once was a time when his words were heeded
Now he and his views are no longer needed.

Has he disappeared just like all the home made “Experts” we used to have in the pubs, Google definitely did away with them, now they just sulk in the corner thinking of their glory days before the internet.
You remember them chaps, they could name every one of “The Magnificent Seven”, every American president, tell you what James Cagney’s last words were in the film “White Heat”, Elvis Presley’s first record, how many soldiers were sculptured into the Wellington monument in the Phoenix Park, and where the other O’Connell bridge was etc., etc.
Then you had the real smart arses who’d ask you how would you walk across Dublin city without passing a pub, the regulars would ramble off in all directions naming all the streets they were “walking down” then someone would break in and say “Now hang on a minute Charlie, you just passed Mick’s Bar there at the junction of Parnell street and Capel street, you’ll have to go back to Henry street again”
Of course it was a trick question, the simple answer was not to pass any pub, just go into them all.

It’s a shame really, they were so well read and now all that knowledge, useless that it was, is no longer part of the Dublin pub scene, everyone is all Googled up and ready for action these days.

Re: Leisurely Scribbles (part 5)

Sad times, when compos mentisness is reliant on cross reference with a Search Engine.

Re: Leisurely Scribbles (part 5)

Thought I would be a bit of a drama queen and get admitted to hospital..istill feeing rough and glad to here. Never thought I would say that. With you in spirit if not mentally.

Re: Leisurely Scribbles (part 5)

I hope you'll feel better soon, Solo ..... best wishes to you.

Re: Leisurely Scribbles (part 5)

Just as long as you are not Hospitalised due to partaking in too many "Spirits" solo.