19-11-2017, 04:59 PM
3542
Re: Leisurely Scribbles (part 5)
Originally Posted by
Robert Jnr.
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Fruitcake, you are as barmy as the rest of us, welcome (you too Sweetie pie)
Oh, I thought I was as normal as the rest of you.
A quote from a filum series called The Tenth Kingdom. A local yokel has just done something silly. One of the heroes of the plot says to him, "You're a complete idiot!"
The local bridles and looks very upset, then replies, "If only!
Now my father, he were a complete idiot. I'm only a half-wit."
Originally Posted by
Jem
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Be careful with that drill Fruity lad, they can become addictive, once you have the power in your hand you want to drill everything in sight, holes all over the place, you just can’t stop, my missus locks away my Black & Decker whenever it ends up in the house “There’ll be no holes drilled here by amateur drillers, you stick to you own game sunny jim”
Amateur drillers? she says it with such authority you’d swear you were going to drilling for oil.
There was once an old friend of mine who married a girl by the name of Josephine, she was a terror. Not long after they were married she came up to the local at lunch time one Saturday when he forgot to go home, God help him he was enjoying the craic, he worked very hard and seldom got out, she had his dinner covered with a large tea towel, she plonked the steaming hot plate of corned beef, cabbage, and mashed potatoes in front of him at our table “Eat that, and don’t expect any supper when you come home, I’ll be off with the girls having a night out, see ya in the morning if your lucky” then stormed out. I kid you not, a real brazen hussy.
Well you’d want to see yermans face, you could light a cigarette off it. Old regular Mickser Devlin looks at the knife and fork beside the meal then smiles at yerman then he quotes Josey Wales “Well are you gonna pull those pistols or whistle Dixie?”
Ever since that day all the lads called her Josey Wales, needless to say the marriage didn’t last long, I believe Josey is somewhere in Canada now, probably breaking in Moose on a ranch, she was one tough bird I can tell you.
Here’s a thought, who breaks in the Reindeers for Santa?
Ah well, it wasn't just any old drill you know. This was a SDS hammer drill, and I fitted a long hole that went right through the wall at the front of the house, intentional like.
My Lovely Cousin is quite happy for me to get my big boys toys out whenever I need them, except my arc-welder which I am banned from using, (but that's for health reasons.)
Mind you, she has come to expect perfection from me when I get my tools out, but alas I have made a rod for my own back. Well I've got an anvil and a big hammer you see so it wasn't that dicky-fult.
I now dread hearing the dreaded wurds when she utters them ...
I've had an idea, or
I've been thinking, or
Why don't
we?
It inevitably means another job has been added to my long list of jobs to be jobbed, and the new job is always added at the top of the list of jobs to be jobbed. Consequently I then get told off for not finishing jobs lower down the list of jobs to be jobbed because the new job at the top of the list of jobs to be jobbed is of course a higher priority than the rest of the jobs on the list of jobs to be jobbed. *sigh*
I love her to bits though.
I have just crumbled by the way.
Right, there is just time for me to take my ankle grinder (that's not a spilling mastike, as anyone who has used one will know) to a pole before the dark arrives to cleanse the light.
The weather will change as soon as I have cut the pole off at its knees.