When love goes

Do you ever suddenly realize that you don't love someone?
We are predisposed to love our siblings brought up together and have the same childhood experiences .

Suddenly today I realized that I don't love my brother anymore.

He is not someone to rely one do anything that doesn't in convenience him or to be for you when the chips are down .

I realised that if we were never to meet again it would make no difference.

Sad but there it is he probably feels the same about me.

I never thought I would feel this way he is my brother.

Re: When love goes

Same thing for me with my sister. We haven't spoken in years.

Re: When love goes

Don't beat yourself up Muddy.

There I probably more people than you realise who are in the same boat - myself for one.

Whether others agree or not, I believe we can't automatically love somebody purely because they are family, and we shouldn't feel guilty if we don't.

Things have usually occured, often many times, to make that love go.
We can't keep forgiving for ever.

Re: When love goes

My sister and I never really got on. I detested her. So far removed from myself. I'm feet on the ground, she was full of crap and head in the clouds. I'm caring, she's not. I think of others, she never has. She always lied too, whereas I don't. (Well apart from little ones sometimes).

We grew up rarely in touch when we left home and went our separate ways.

Now we're more in touch, but I can honestly say I sometimes like her now, but I can't say I would ever 'love' her.
I'd probably be sad when she dies (she's 2 yrs older), but I wouldn't miss her I don't think. Having said that, I am sentimental so will probably miss her of sorts.

To be fair, she has, over the past 5yrs or so, been more thoughtful(ish). But she's still not my sort of person.

Re: When love goes

I didn't love my brother, and while it might sound unfeeling to others it brought peace to the family when he died 3 years ago.

Re: When love goes

As children we idealise those we love. Life teaches us that nobody is perfect. If our love is based on ideals then we will find that hard to accept.

Re: When love goes

People who cause distress or affect you in a negative way are not worth bothering with, no matter who they are. That's something I've decided and my life is better for it.

Re: When love goes

My older brothers, in their grief of losing mum, vowed they would continue to help hold the family glue together

The reality, 2 years down the line is that I am the only one who posts of wider family news, or indeed any news, via our WhatsApp group.

I love them dearly but they don't see beyond their own immediate family bubble

I'm considering stopping messaging..
They'll be bloomin panicking then!

Re: When love goes

Muddy – you probably know the saying 'you can choose your friends but not your family'? I feel just the same about my so-called 'sister', after she stole from our mother and then 'did a runner' abroad some seven or eight years' ago now. If I never see her again it will be too soon!

Re: When love goes

Truer words never spoken.