24-02-2014, 09:02 PM
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How to get to Heaven from Ireland
A true Story from an Irish Sunday School TeacherI was testing children in my Dublin Sunday school class to see if they understood the concept of getting to heaven. I asked them, "If I sold my house and my car, had a big garage sale and gave all my money to the church, would that get me into heaven?"
"NO!" the children answered.
"If I cleaned the church every day, mowed the garden, and kept everything tidy, would that get me into heaven?" Again, the answer was NO!
"If I gave sweets to all the children, and loved my husband, would that get me into heaven?" Again, they all answered NO!
I was just bursting with pride for them. I continued, "Then how can I get into heaven?"
A little boy shouted out, "YUV GOTTA BE F*CKING DEAD."
07-03-2014, 03:28 AM
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Re: How to get to Heaven from Ireland
Mom and Dad were trying to console Susie, whose dog, Skipper, had recently died.
"You know," Mom said, "it's not so bad. Skipper's probably up in Heaven right now, having a grand old time with God."
Susie stopped crying and asked, "What would God want with a dead dog?"
08-03-2014, 10:14 PM
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Re: How to get to Heaven from Ireland
On another forum, a member asked what was the best way to see Ireland. I suggested that it was from the boat going to Scotland.Another member responded that he was insulted to which I said that from my knowledge of the Irish (North & South) a sense of humour was one of their great attributes. I wonder if he's heard the one about the dead dog....?
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