13-12-2009, 07:14 PM
1
Your Christmas Jokes!
Let's laugh (hopefully!) our way up to Christmas
Post your Christmas jokes here .........
It was coming up to Christmas and the Judge was in a jolly frame of mind.
"Now then, please tell me, what is the charge against you?"
" I was caught doing my Christmas shopping very early." replied the man in the dock.
"That doesn't seem like an offence to me. What do you mean by 'very early?
"Well, your Honour." said the defendant, "It was before the shop was open."
14-12-2009, 03:56 PM
3
Re: Your Christmas Jokes!
What do you call a man with christmas wrapping paper on his head?Russell
What do you call a penguin in the Sahara desert?
Lost
Why does Santa have 3 gardens?
So he can Hoe Hoe Hoe
If athletes get athletes foot, what do astronauts get?
Missile toe
What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?
Frostbite!
What does a cat on the beach have in common with Christmas?
Sandy Claws
What do you call people who are afraid of Santa Claus?
Claustrophobic
Why are Christmas trees like bad knitters?
They both drop their needles
What do you give a train driver for Christmas?
Platform shoes
What did Adam say on the day before Christmas?
It's Christmas, Eve
What do you call a donkey with 3 legs?
Wonky
How do you make an idiot laugh on boxing day?
Tell him a joke on Christmas Eve
Where do pirates do their Christmas shopping?
Arrrgos
What do you call a letter sent up the chimney on Christmas Eve?
Black mail
Why does Father Christmas go down the chimney?
Because it soots him
How many chimney does Father Christmas go down?
Stacks
How to cats greet each other at Christmas?
"A furry merry Christmas & Happy mew year"
What did the guest sing at the Eskimo's Christmas party?
Freeze a jolly fellow
What beats his chest and swings from Christmas cake to Christmas cake?
Tarzipan
Whats happens if you eat the Christmas decorations?
You get tinsel-itus
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