Re: Leisurely Scribbles (part 5)

I am reminded of the teacher asking the class to come up with something with the word Timbuktu in it and the usual Johnny stands up.

“As Tim and I walked through Kent
We spied three maidens in a tent
Their hair was black and their eyes were blue
I bucked one and Timbuktu”

Next time she’ll be looking for something with the words Glocca Morra in it.
Did you know there is no such place as Glocca Morra.

Re: Leisurely Scribbles (part 5)

That was a lovely piece of work in the poetry section RJ, the one about the golden haired lady, a nice story, yes it’s always better to leave well enough alone.
This is true and I kid you not, my wife’s hair is still the same auburn colour as it always was, she’s 71 now and hasn’t got a single grey hair, she never dyed it in her life, i think that’s very strange. Maybe there’s some truth in what they say about worrying turning you grey, she never worried about anything, she left it all to me.
There was a young chap who lived on our street and he worked in the fur trade as an apprentice, he had a lovely head of thick red hair but it all fell out when he was seventeen, they thought it was something to do with working on fur, or “the Minks jinks” as he called it, you know the way some hatters used to go nuts from the chemicals they used, anyway he got a red wig and wore it all his life. I bumped into him outside Specsavers (I believe that happens a lot outside Specsaver shops) a few weeks ago, he would be about 70 now, he still had a roaring red wig on him, winder if it was the same one he had when he was seventeen, it was in the same Elvis style, he was always a big fan, true what they say, some folks never change.

Re: Leisurely Scribbles (part 5)

Thanks, Jem, I pondered over this next bit after reading your notion "people don't change

Robert Burns
O would some power the giftie gie us to see ourselves as others see us.
(O would some power the gift to give us to see ourselves as others see us.)

Re: Leisurely Scribbles (part 5)

I had a strange encounter the other night, as I sat in my darkened lounge, strange illuminated circles appeared on the vacant emulsioned walls, and a voice said "I know you can hear me Earthman Spitty", I said "Is that the voice of the Mystery Ron".

Re: Leisurely Scribbles (part 5)

ESPECIALLY if you happen to be Jonathan Woss!

[don't you think it a tad iwonic that his surname starts with an 'R'?]

Re: Leisurely Scribbles (part 5)

rising damp I'd say - and too much of the golden amber!

Re: Leisurely Scribbles (part 5)

In the beginning God covered the earth with broccoli, cauliflower, and spinach, green, yellow, and red vegetables of all kinds; so Man and Woman would live long and healthy lives.
Then using God's bountiful gifts, Satan created Ben and Jerry's and Krispy Kreme. And Satan said, "You want hot fudge with that?" And Man said, "Yes!" and Woman said, "I'll have another with sprinkles." And lo they gained 10 pounds.
And God created the healthful yogurt that Woman might keep the figure that Man found so fair.
And Satan brought forth white flour from the wheat, and sugar from the cane, and combined them. And Woman went from size 2 to size 10.
So God said, "Try my fresh green salad."
And Satan presented crumbled Bleu Cheese dressing and garlic toast on the side. And Man and Woman unfastened their belts following the repast.
God then said, "I have sent you heart healthy vegetables and olive oil in which to cook them."
And Satan brought forth deep fried coconut shrimp, butter dipped lobster chunks and chicken-fried steak so big it needed its own platter. And Man's cholesterol went through the roof.
God then brought forth running shoes so that his Children might lose those extra pounds.
And Satan came forth with a cable TV with remote control so Man would not have to toil changing the channels. And man and woman laughed and cried before the flickering light and started wearing stretch jogging suits.
Then God brought forth the potato, naturally low in fat and brimming with potassium and good nutrition.
Then Satan peeled off the healthful skin and sliced the starchy center into chips and deep-fried them in animal fats and added copious quantities of salt. And Man put on more pounds.
God then gave lean beef so that Man might consume fewer calories and still satisfy his appetite.
And Satan created McDonald's and the 99-cent double cheeseburger. Then Lucifer said, "You want fries with that?" and Man replied, "Yes! And super size' em!" And Satan said, "It is good." And Man went into cardiac arrest.
God sighed and created quadruple bypass surgery.
And Satan created The National Health Service...

Amen

Re: Leisurely Scribbles (part 5)

In the last century, Life Expectancy (time wise) has nigh doubled, were the Humanists responsible for Creation, creation of the Pharmaceutical Companies, that is?

Re: Leisurely Scribbles (part 5)

Re: Leisurely Scribbles (part 5)

You men make me laugh with your wise and witty posts .... long may they continue!