Scotland and Switzerland to swap places after Brexit

According to the German newspaper The Postillian Finally an amicable a solution has been reached about Scotland.

The governments of Scotland and Switzerland have taken a historic decision: before the end of summer, the two countries are to swap their current state territories. This means that Switzerland will finally cease to be surrounded by EU member states, whilst Scotland will move right into the heart of the EU in the wake of the disappointing Brexit vote.

The two countries quickly settled upon the deal earlier this week. The intention is that by the middle of the year, 8 million Swiss people will have migrated to Scotland and 5.3 million Scots will have moved to the Alps.

“This is a brilliant solution for the Scottish people”, enthused First Minister Nicola Sturgeon following her most recent visit to Switzerland. “Our Highlands will be even higher, as well as being right in the middle of Europe. We will also no longer have to put up with having the dreadful English to the south of the border.” The Swiss are extremely content, too: “We’ve never had Alps so readily accessible before”, explains Federal President Johann Schneider-Ammann. “We even get our own coastline thrown in! And we’ll have twice as much space, too. We’ll also finally be rid of these terrible Germans.”

Conversely, in neighbouring countries, there is general consensus that it does not really matter exactly which mountain folk with ridiculous accents and strange customs are to live next door. The next few months will be crucial for the Scottish and Swiss people: both countries are to be thoroughly cleaned and ready for handover no later than June. In both countries, the first national monuments have already been removed and prepared for transport.

Switzerland is paying special attention to the planned designs for its new capital, Edinbürgli (formerly Edinburgh), and the congested urban area of Glasgau (formerly Glasgow). The Scottish delegation plans to install its most important monuments and buildings in Zuroaich and Bannockbern (formerly Zürich and Bern).

Re: Scotland and Switzerland to swap places after Brexit

Bruce what are you on???!!!

Re: Scotland and Switzerland to swap places after Brexit

Thank God we will no longer have to put up with having those dreadful scots to the north of us.

Re: Scotland and Switzerland to swap places after Brexit

Love it

Re: Scotland and Switzerland to swap places after Brexit

HEH HEH....nice one..I shall have to practice My Yodeling

I shall just ignore the comments to come..oh I see they've started already

Re: Scotland and Switzerland to swap places after Brexit

It's only funny because it can't happen may, personally if it were true I'd be campaigning against it, nothing against the Swiss but the scots make Scotland really, we've always loved our visits and as much as the scenery is great it's the people we remember most.

Re: Scotland and Switzerland to swap places after Brexit

I just hope May will still be able to post on Over50's when she's so far away........Will they have a long enough wire???

Bruce, thanks for keeping us informed on world events, the Postillian is now my prefered news outlet.....

Re: Scotland and Switzerland to swap places after Brexit

Sorry but you have missed the important story on the front page.


Monday, 19 December 2016
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Münster (dpo) - There’s finally hope for the critically ill! The Münster University Hospital has set up an intensive care unit exclusively for the treatment of male patients suffering from coughs, colds, or even both. A specially trained team provides 24/7 care.

Re: Scotland and Switzerland to swap places after Brexit

Does this mean that the Scots will be having deep-fried Toblerones instead of Mars bars?

Re: Scotland and Switzerland to swap places after Brexit

Marvellous idea, problem solved...