22-03-2019, 11:19 AM
332
Re: Let's have a laugh
Originally Posted by Primus1
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So , if you farted in a forest, and nobody was around, would you still smell it..?
I had thought of investing in a big cork but that, like Brexit, would be nothing more than delaying the inevitable.
22-03-2019, 12:55 PM
333
Re: Let's have a laugh
Engineers and ManagersA man is flying in a hot air balloon and realises he is lost. He reduces altitude and spots a man down below. He lowers the balloon further and shouts, "Excuse me, can you help me? I promised my friend I would meet him half an hour ago, but I don't know where I am."
The man below says, "Yes, you are in a hot air balloon, hovering approximately 30 feet above this field. You are between 40 and 42 degrees N. latitude, and between 58 and 60 degrees W. longitude."
You must be an engineer!" says the balloonist. "I am," replied the man."How did you know?"
Well," says the balloonist, "Everything you told me is technically correct, but I have no idea what to make of your information, and the fact is, I am still lost."
The man below says, "You must be a manager!" I am replies the balloonist, but how did you know?" "Well," says the engineer, "You don't know where you are, or where you are going. You have made a promise, which you have no idea how to keep, and you expect me to solve your problem. The fact is you are in the exact same position you were in before we met, but now it is somehow, my fault."
22-03-2019, 02:43 PM
334
Re: Let's have a laugh
Not a joke but.......We were out having a stroll earlier. Myself, my wife, and my dog. Two ladies were chatting away.
"Beware of the vicious beast", I warned them.
They smiled at Max. He wagged his tail for them - the big gentle fellow that he is.
!No, I didn't mean the dog!"
That got a laugh.
"Just wait til she gets you home!"
22-03-2019, 02:48 PM
335
Re: Let's have a laugh
Originally Posted by mr ploppy
->
engineers and managersa man is flying in a hot air balloon and realises he is lost. He reduces altitude and spots a man down below. He lowers the balloon further and shouts, "excuse me, can you help me? I promised my friend i would meet him half an hour ago, but i don't know where i am."
the man below says, "yes, you are in a hot air balloon, hovering approximately 30 feet above this field. You are between 40 and 42 degrees n. Latitude, and between 58 and 60 degrees w. Longitude."
you must be an engineer!" says the balloonist. "i am," replied the man."how did you know?"
well," says the balloonist, "everything you told me is technically correct, but i have no idea what to make of your information, and the fact is, i am still lost."
the man below says, "you must be a manager!" i am replies the balloonist, but how did you know?" "well," says the engineer, "you don't know where you are, or where you are going. You have made a promise, which you have no idea how to keep, and you expect me to solve your problem. The fact is you are in the exact same position you were in before we met, but now it is somehow, my fault."
23-03-2019, 06:22 PM
340
Re: Let's have a laugh
Originally Posted by Besoeker
->
Not a joke but.......We were out having a stroll earlier. Myself, my wife, and my dog. Two ladies were chatting away.
"Beware of the vicious beast", I warned them.
They smiled at Max. He wagged his tail for them - the big gentle fellow that he is.
!No, I didn't mean the dog!"
That got a laugh.
"Just wait til she gets you home!"
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