22-10-2018, 10:05 PM
1
Being Too Critical... Are You, On Occasions?
I have decided, l am too critical. I realised this today when l went to my local hospital for a routine visit.On leaving the hospital, l noticed patients sitting on the wall outside lighting up or taking drags of a ciggie. I thought to myself, ‘How selfish you lot are. You’re in a hospital, probably receiving expensive, dedicated treatment and you’re sitting outside, smoking your heads off’!
In the next instance, l pulled myself up and thought, ‘Who are you to judge, what’s it got to do with you, so let them be and mind your own business’!
So l ask, do you think, sometimes, you are too critical of other people and situations? Even, when posting on Forums?
Do you sometimes think, ‘Who am l to judge, so live and let live’!
22-10-2018, 11:38 PM
3
Re: Being Too Critical... Are You, On Occasions?
Art - You thought it to yourself but you didn't go up to them & say it to their face so what does it matter?Being critical of others in your own mind is ok I would have thought..
As for people smoking at hospitals - I recently saw a group of nurses taking a smoking break on an unused balcony. It could be seen from the window of the ward I was visiting!!
I secretly feel superior to them and critical of them because I managed to give it up years ago - I wouldn't tell them that though!!
23-10-2018, 12:23 AM
5
Re: Being Too Critical... Are You, On Occasions?
I think many of us can be too critical at times Art, mainly because we don't know anything about the situation, it is just a 'first glimpse' reaction.Take the smoking at the hospital for example.
I can understand you feeling that way at first, but there can be a lot more to it.
Let me tell you a little story.
My son had a girlfriend when they were both youngsters. Then they fell out. They never lost touch though, and had an on/off relationship for next 25 years or so.
I was very fond of the gal.
When she was only young, she was at my house one day and suddenly fell and hit herself on a glass dividing door. I went to help her up but saw immediately that something was terrible wrong.
I phoned a doctor, got her in the car, and took her straight there.
To cut a long story short, they found she has MS.
The years went on, and she gradually deteriorated.
Then last spring, my doorbell went and it was my son and his on/off lady friend. After all those years and other relatonships, etc, they still kept in touch. It was lovely to see her again.
Sadly, now she was on crutches to walk though.
Soon after this visit, she had a bad fall and was admitted to hospital.
Both me and my son were visiting her there.
Then some even worse news came.
She not only had the awful MS, she now had lung cancer too.
They moved her to a hospice.
I went most days to see her as I knew her time was nearly up.
This lovely person, who'd I known since she was in her teens, was now a shadow of the girl I had always known.
I visited her daily in the hospice, and so did my son.
She would ask me to take her outside in her wheelchair for a cigarette.
I admit I was a bit shocked by this at first, but then I thought - what was the point of trying to stop her now, the damage was done, and she was dying anyway?
Why deny her that 10 minutes of pleasure and freedom at this late stage?
It wouldn't have saved her, would it.
So I would wrap a blanket around her and wheel her outside into the grounds for her fag.
We would sometimes get people staring at us, no doubt thinking much the same as you did Art, . . . . but they didn't know the story, did they. They didn't know it was too late for her now.
That lovely lass died a couple of weeks later.
I was with her that morning, and then got a call to say she had died in the afternoon.
I feel quite tearful explaining that story.
23-10-2018, 02:55 AM
6
Re: Being Too Critical... Are You, On Occasions?
Originally Posted by Mups
->
I think many of us can be too critical at times Art, mainly because we don't know anything about the situation, it is just a 'first glimpse' reaction.Take the smoking at the hospital for example.
I can understand you feeling that way at first, but there can be a lot more to it.
Let me tell you a little story.
My son had a girlfriend when they were both youngsters. Then they fell out. They never lost touch though, and had an on/off relationship for next 25 years or so.
I was very fond of the gal.
When she was only young, she was at my house one day and suddenly fell and hit herself on a glass dividing door. I went to help her up but saw immediately that something was terrible wrong.
I phoned a doctor, got her in the car, and took her straight there.
To cut a long story short, they found she has MS.
The years went on, and she gradually deteriorated.
Then last spring, my doorbell went and it was my son and his on/off lady friend. After all those years and other relatonships, etc, they still kept in touch. It was lovely to see her again.
Sadly, now she was on crutches to walk though.
Soon after this visit, she had a bad fall and was admitted to hospital.
Both me and my son were visiting her there.
Then some even worse news came.
She not only had the awful MS, she now had lung cancer too.
They moved her to a hospice.
I went most days to see her as I knew her time was nearly up.
This lovely person, who'd I known since she was in her teens, was now a shadow of the girl I had always known.
I visited her daily in the hospice, and so did my son.
She would ask me to take her outside in her wheelchair for a cigarette.
I admit I was a bit shocked by this at first, but then I thought - what was the point of trying to stop her now, the damage was done, and she was dying anyway?
Why deny her that 10 minutes of pleasure and freedom at this late stage?
It wouldn't have saved her, would it.
So I would wrap a blanket around her and wheel her outside into the grounds for her fag.
We would sometimes get people staring at us, no doubt thinking much the same as you did Art, . . . . but they didn't know the story, did they. They didn't know it was too late for her now.
That lovely lass died a couple of weeks later.
I was with her that morning, and then got a call to say she had died in the afternoon.
I feel quite tearful explaining that story.
I think I’m very accepting of others but I can be very critical at times. My parents are very critical of others but I think I’m the most critical with myself than I am with anyone else.
23-10-2018, 05:58 AM
7
Re: Being Too Critical... Are You, On Occasions?
I try not to judge other people by appearances. Actually, I try not to judge them at all as I am far from perfect myself but sometimes you can't help it, especially from first impressions.However I don't voice any of my negative feelings as really, unless it directly affects me, it's none of my business.
Live and let live I say, nobody is ever perfect, least of all ourselves
23-10-2018, 06:55 AM
9
Re: Being Too Critical... Are You, On Occasions?
Originally Posted by Nicol
->
I try not to judge other people by appearances. Actually, I try not to judge them at all as I am far from perfect myself but sometimes you can't help it, especially from first impressions.However I don't voice any of my negative feelings as really, unless it directly affects me, it's none of my business.
Live and let live I say, nobody is ever perfect, least of all ourselves
We really dont know and never will know what really goes on in others lives unless they tell us,but initial impressions are always there for everyone.
I often think of things in my head to myself but keep them to myself which is where they should end.
23-10-2018, 07:14 AM
10
Re: Being Too Critical... Are You, On Occasions?
Originally Posted by Artangel
->
I have decided, l am too critical. I realised this today when l went to my local hospital for a routine visit.On leaving the hospital, l noticed patients sitting on the wall outside lighting up or taking drags of a ciggie. I thought to myself, ‘How selfish you lot are. You’re in a hospital, probably receiving expensive, dedicated treatment and you’re sitting outside, smoking your heads off’!
In the next instance, l pulled myself up and thought, ‘Who are you to judge, what’s it got to do with you, so let them be and mind your own business’!
So l ask, do you think, sometimes, you are too critical of other people and situations? Even, when posting on Forums?
Do you sometimes think, ‘Who am l to judge, so live and let live’!
I have only ever saw one post that I thought you were not looking at the big picture. the rest have been very considerate and you come across as a very suportive person Arty.
I really like you a lot and I have high respect for your posts. I know you go the extra mile to find somehting interesting for us to hash over the forum, and I for one, am very very grateful........
Dn't be too hard on yourself Arty, you need a pat on the back.....or how about a hug
Blue x
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