Re: Should we forgive
Having been there it's from personal experience that I can say that if someone hurts you that badly and the result is deep emotional hurt, then if you don't forgive you are allowing that person to continue to hurt you, they are still controlling your emotions in that way. Hurt can also turn to anger but forgiving can prevent that from happening.
Forgiveness is not condoning the actions of whoever caused you to feel deeply hurt, it is more that it will free you from negative thoughts of bitterness and maybe later, anger.
I never used to understand forgiveness until I experienced what it was like to be unable to forgive easily. When I learned what it actually was I found a different way of life if you like. In no way is this religious as I am not but it was like a release from some really bad place and equally bad thoughts, allowing it to be far easier to deal with emotional feelings.
Around this time I also found out 'how we tick', that made me realise what happens to a person who doesn't forgive. It's all in how our minds and emotions work with each other. Something else I found out about was how not reacting negatively in any given situation prevents the other person from having control of you, they are powerless without that expected reaction. If you have ever tried to argue with a person who will not argue then you will know exactly what I mean.