07-02-2018, 12:26 AM
4765
Re: Leisurely Scribbles (part 5)
Originally Posted by Jem
->
I used to have acne as a young man and the mates used to slag me "Beam me up Spotty"
I thought Diana Dors was a lovely warm person, not to mention how good she looked, I’ve watched several interviews of her, what a pity she died at only 52 from ovarian cancer.
As RJ once pointed out her real name was Diana Fluck and when she began her film career she was asked to change her name, she picked Dors, her maternal grandmothers maiden name.
“They asked me to change my name. I suppose they were afraid that if my real name Diana Fluck was in lights and one of the lights blew”
07-02-2018, 12:31 AM
4766
Re: Leisurely Scribbles (part 5)
I like these stairs.https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2lXh2n0aPyw
07-02-2018, 12:33 AM
4767
Re: Leisurely Scribbles (part 5)
did they have female moonrakers then?
Down Vizes way zom years agoo,
When smuggal'n wur nuthen new,
An people wurden nar bit shy,
Of who they did their sperrits buy.
In a village liv'd a publican,
Whi kept an Inn, The Pelican,
A man he wur, a man a merrit
An his neam wur Ikey Perritt.
Ael roun about tha country voke
Tha praise of thease yer landlard spoke;
Var wen any on'em wur took bad,
They knaw'd wur sperrits could be had;
An daly it wur nice an handy,
At tha Pelican to get yer brandy.
Twer zwold as chep as tis in Vrance,
Tho a course, twer done in iggerance.
didn't know yiz kid speaks like dat fruitcake - prefer nutcakes meself !
07-02-2018, 12:44 AM
4768
Re: Leisurely Scribbles (part 5)
Originally Posted by gumbud
->
did they have female moonrakers then?Down Vizes way zom years agoo,
When smuggal'n wur nuthen new,
An people wurden nar bit shy,
Of who they did their sperrits buy.
In a village liv'd a publican,
Whi kept an Inn, The Pelican,
A man he wur, a man a merrit
An his neam wur Ikey Perritt.
Ael roun about tha country voke
Tha praise of thease yer landlard spoke;
Var wen any on'em wur took bad,
They knaw'd wur sperrits could be had;
An daly it wur nice an handy,
At tha Pelican to get yer brandy.
Twer zwold as chep as tis in Vrance,
Tho a course, twer done in iggerance.
didn't know yiz kid speaks like dat fruitcake - prefer nutcakes meself !
Whoilzt I be ridgnally a Moonraaakur, I dun moved a Zumerzet a-cause a zurtain young Zumerzet mizz an cuzzin a-moine asked oi to, zo I maid Zumerzet moi adaaapted 'ome. One o moi kidz do zpeak Brizzle a-cause ee were borned thur afore us adaapted I'm, an' tother zpeaks recived pruuncification Ingliesh, bit caaaan zpeak Mumerzet when ee do be waaantin' us to unnnerstaaan Im, snow.
Roite, them revenuerz am gorn. Anybuddy worn to buy zum cheese?
07-02-2018, 04:08 AM
4769
Re: Leisurely Scribbles (part 5)
Strangely,young Mr Fruitcake,one's offspring-of the female gender-was taken as a child to Plymouth. That was the result of my arriving home A/quietly,as it was 02.45hrs GMT and B/finding one of my drivers [I owned a haulage company at the time] busily-and noisily-pleasuring Mrs Pug in our marital bed. "Hmm" thought I...for I am a man of deep contemplation..."this is somewhat unfortunate". HE,went through the bedroom window,propelled by what one might well refer to as 'a spot of annoyance'. ANYWAY...the result of this unfortunate incident was the two of them 'having it on their toes' to Plymouth. NO idea why they chose Plymouth,other than it's several miles from Casa Pug...well,ok,circa 270 miles,give-or-take a yard or two. MNy daughter at the time was 9 years od,with a rather rustic Essex accent. Today,she speaks zorrt urv loik tharrt,bert wutha koinduv brogue yen'd gotta scamie twunnerstaaaan',y'zee.Hmm...and the ONE thing my lil girl [coz she'll ALLUZ be my lil girl] always begins ANY conversation [usually,I might add,via the interwebz thingy] is HOW did I manage to hospitalise scumbags three brothers when they smashed in my front door at 00.15hrs three days after my wife,daughter and that scabby,cowardly,scum-sucking arsewipe [I don't like him...I do hope it doesn't show] left for forn parts. Well,ok,Plymouth-but it's the same thing. I was sat at my kitchen table...which,by chance,was perfect for looking down the long hall to the front door. It suddenly came off it's mountings,as three chaps intent on harming me came through it. BUT-they were in each others way,y'see. Two hammers and a large knife [I still,to this day,20 years after this incident,have that knife in my kitchen draw..its a good quality bone-handle,y'see. However-when the police arrived,they were all unconscious on the hall floor,various injuries sustained,the knife in question and the two hammers still in THEIR hands. ME? I was sat at my kitchen table doing the crossword they'd so rudely interrupted. BUT....the police arrested MOI!!! NOT the three mongs who'd caved my door in and come a-hooting and a-hollering down my hallway,waving a weapon apiece...no...they arrested ME! The most gentle man on this planet. #sigh#
I was arrested for my "Professional violence". Yep,you can check the court records - I have,it's still available. I was found Not Guilty...because A/I am now a civvie-and I'm known for my exceptional gentleness to kittens and grannies and B/there were three of the prats,each with a weapon...and their invasive assault on my front door was captured by my then neighbour's cctv!
Ok,I admit,they were in Basildon hospital for several weeks,undergoing remedial surgery-but,fukkem. I lost my daughter and my home due to those arse nuggets. [It was burgled while I was in the cells...stripped TOTALLY bare]. They left one broken lightbulb...EVERYTHING was gone,as witnessed by my mate Atillio,who drove me home from the court..
I went after the gutless,spineless twat who stole my motorcycle...found him in A Birmingham pub. But that's a story you REALLY don't want to hear. I'll just say,he-and his spunkmunching gang of wellard biker mates,NEVER will forget the night I walked,unknown to them,into their ''wellards only'' pub.
Now...you lot may be wondering why I've written all this...it's stuff you didn't want to know,dont care about,couldn't give a shit about,have no interest in,etc,etc. Well,I wrote it because I feel like shit,tonight. Tonight,is the anniversary of my grandson dying. I was there,HELPLESS to do anything,as the medics tried over-and-over to save him. He's buried in the same grave as my other daughter,Ella. Tonight,I just feel like shit. I could let rip and tell you EXACTLY how I smashed those bastards into bits-DESPITE their weapons. But,no point. I just feel like shit. So I thought perhaps playing it out once more over this infernal machine to you all,may help alleviate this DEEP anger swelling within me. Its ALL because that bastard Derek Robinson-a 'man' I gave a home AND a job to,was discovered,,by me,in the act of f~cking my wife,that this nightmare happened. I can tell you one thing,REGARDLESS of how intelligent you may think yourself to be,that cannot be UN-learned'-and that thing is the combat proficiency one learns and retains,when one is recruited into certain sections of our military forces. And that proficiency can REALLY bugger your life up. I mean,REALLY bugger it up.Ok-I've ruined everyone's day;I'll bugger off. I truly apologise. LESSON? DON'T be 'professional' when protecting yourself,those you love,your possesions-or gumbud
.
07-02-2018, 08:03 AM
4770
Re: Leisurely Scribbles (part 5)
well wot can one say ? - I say again wot can one say - it's a good job you belong to this gentlemans [and one delightful ladies] support group - we are here for you Pugsy - just take ya time and let it all out and then you can move onto the english grammar ; social graces and elocution [sorry meant electrocution] lessons!!well over to you Sweetie Pie we know he's broke ya heart!!
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