Re-building trust in a relationship

Hi all,

You may have seen me on the boards recently picking your lovely brains for some inspiration and quotes for some articles (all approved by the mods).

One of my final articles in my latest batch for Saga is about rebuilding trust in a relationship. It's a tricky subject, but I wondered if any of you were the ones to make a mistake (perhaps an affair or something else) and how you went about rebuilding trust again? Was it more difficult than you imagined and do you feel now that there is trust back in your relationship?

Only using first names (fake names if you prefer) so you won't be identified and also not linking to this site or anything.

Best wishes,
Julia

Re: Re-building trust in a relationship

That's one I can't help you with thankfully, almost hope no one else can either but knowing human beings can hurt each other in many ways I am thinking you will find several people to help you.
Good luck with your articles !

Re: Re-building trust in a relationship

Thank you, I'll post links to them when they are live

Re: Re-building trust in a relationship

That would be interesting looking forward to reading them.

Re: Re-building trust in a relationship

Don't post on the same forum is all I can say.

Re: Re-building trust in a relationship

Being honest and saying you are truly sorry - goes a long way
Hopefully too - to be able to communicate the reasons for going awry
I always do this with someone I care for, I don't like things unsettled
Unfortunately, in some cases, a person may not be willing to listen ......

Re: Re-building trust in a relationship

It could have been my fault. Maybe it was. My husband decided to leave me after 30 years. We'd been together for 33 years. I didn't change who I was, but he moved on to pastures new workwise, and I probably didn't. He mixed with different people. I think I was left behind in the world we previously lived in. Anyway, he decided to leave. He'd formed a "friendship" with someone else and wanted to take it further. At the beginning I would have taken him back in a heartbeat. He'd come and pick my 16 year old son up at the weekends and I'd be sitting, makeup done, nice clothes on. Then break my heart when he left. When I think back now I was always myself. I divorced him and have moved on now. I felt I had the ultimate betrayal and could not rebuild trust. I still cannot believe it all. A huge part of my life was lost, or so it seemed. If he had died it would have been easier for me. Terrible to say, I know. He wasn't a bad man and I forgive him as he deserves happiness too. I sincerely hope he is having a good life. It left me feeling very insecure and distrustful. There are people out there who can try and get trust back, but I now know it would not have been for me.

Re: Re-building trust in a relationship

Trust is hard earned and easily lost, once lost it is difficult, if not impossible, to ever truly trust again the person who broke the trust.

Re: Re-building trust in a relationship

Trust lost is a door permanently closed, for me. Once it's gone, it's gone for good so never look back.

Re: Re-building trust in a relationship

Trust is something that cannot be messed with. It can never be the same if that happens. As I said, I consider being distrustful as being a betrayal. You can't go back from that. Not if you are a loyal person.