Re: Where were you
I had the stag do at my house a week before the wedding. I wanted to make sure nothing distracted me from the most important day of my life.
We got married in our local church a year to the day after I proposed. I didn't mind where we got wed, but my Lovely Cousin wanted a white wedding, to which she was fully entitled, so that's what we had. Our wedding car was an old car owned by her driving instructor.
She was nineteen and I was twenty-nine, and there were about twenty five to thirty guests at the church with perhaps a few more at the reception that was held in the social club of the place where my Uncle/FiL worked.
We got permission to hide our car inside the manufactory gates so it wouldn't get "vandalised". It didn't stop my Aunty/MiL from stuffing confetti down our necks.
I had bought a small caravan for our honeymoon, which was all I could afford at the time, so after the reception we drove back to my place to pick it up then head off to a small campsite in an orchard just outside Hereford where we spent our first ever night together.
We stopped at a motorway services on the way to use the loos. My Lovely was much longer than I expected, so long that I started to worry that there was something wrong and I was about to ask another lady if she would go in to check on my wife.
At that point she came out. Having removed some of her going away outfit, a load of confetti dropped out of her nether coverings, all over the floor, and she spent a good ten minutes trying to pick it up.
After one night in the orchard we spent a week on a campsite in North Wales in a field next to a Residential Rest Home for the Care of the Elderly. Considering our age difference, my teenage bride thought my choice of campsite was rather appropriate.
We then had another week in the Lake District before spending a night near York so we could visit my brother and his family.
I had worked out that Hook Norton in the Cotswolds was halfway between York and home, so we spent one night there on a camp site to break our journey ... in brewery lane. My Lovely Cousin had no idea why I chose that campsite.
That evening I had an assignation with some *Old Hookey.
We got chatting to the landlady of the pub nearest to the brewery and told her it was the last night of our honeymoon. For the rest of the evening, locals would sidle round the end of the bar to check us out, mumble something about, "Yer, unnymewnerz" then wander off again.
We shared the campsite with a squadron of sheep, several of whom must have been given the same message by the landlady because they came to poke their heads into our open caravan door.
That was over thirty seven years ago, but all I can say is that it feels like we are still on honeymoon.
*Old Hookey is a most excellent strong beer made by the most excellent Hook Norton brewery.*