21-05-2019, 03:39 PM
22491
Re: Last to post wins
Originally Posted by Mups
->
Probably ALL of you wee'd if truth be told!See, this is precisely why we ladies can't trust you on your own for five minutes!
Your toilet habits are world renowned.
You either sit there half the day so no one else can get in, or you aim all wrong!
You NEVER get ladies behaving like that, and neither do proper gentlemen either.
They were me pride and joy those plants were, so I am preparing my bill for you, to replace all my dead plants, so you can all go and find all those hidden wallets and cough up immediately!
Our quest is finished-and we chaps emerge victorious!
For,Miss Mups was staying overnight in one of my potting sheds recently. She'd asked if I could lengthen the chain on the outside loo,to negate her needing to jump/swing/flush.
Well,as you chaps know,one is ever the gent,so Mups' desires/needs were accorded.
However...when one strolled out to the shed to knock on the door and ask if Miss Mups might like a pair of p/j's warmed for her,she bellowed from within aforementioned putting shed
"PJ's? PJ'S? You just want me to undress! I know your type!
Well,UNLUCKY! These are MY heavy-duty corduroy knickers-and I'm sticking to them!"
.....so one thought it best not to mention the security cameras to her....but if you chaps fancy watching Mups swinging by both hands from a toilet chain,with her baggy draws around her knees,swearing in fluent Dustbinmannish as she desperately attempts to regain her balance on the toilet seat whilst trying not to land in the shi...er...'avoid further unhappiness'...then send a SAE to ..BLOKESRULELTP.co.uk.
all donations will be forwarded to the ''Mups needs a Dry Pair'' foundation for assisting any/everyoneto smile.....
21-05-2019, 05:34 PM
22492
Re: Last to post wins
Originally Posted by Pug
->
Y'see,chaps-that explains all!Our quest is finished-and we chaps emerge victorious!
For,Miss Mups was staying overnight in one of my potting sheds recently. She'd asked if I could lengthen the chain on the outside loo,to negate her needing to jump/swing/flush.
Well,as you chaps know,one is ever the gent,so Mups' desires/needs were accorded.
However...when one strolled out to the shed to knock on the door and ask if Miss Mups might like a pair of p/j's warmed for her,she bellowed from within aforementioned putting shed
"PJ's? PJ'S? You just want me to undress! I know your type!
Well,UNLUCKY! These are MY heavy-duty corduroy knickers-and I'm sticking to them!"
.....so one thought it best not to mention the security cameras to her....but if you chaps fancy watching Mups swinging by both hands from a toilet chain,with her baggy draws around her knees,swearing in fluent Dustbinmannish as she desperately attempts to regain her balance on the toilet seat whilst trying not to land in the shi...er...'avoid further unhappiness'...then send a SAE to ..BLOKESRULELTP.co.uk.
all donations will be forwarded to the ''Mups needs a Dry Pair'' foundation for assisting any/everyoneto smile.....
21-05-2019, 08:04 PM
22493
Re: Last to post wins
We lovely ladies had our committee meeting today, and unanimously came to the conclusion there are no real gentlemen around these days.We felt a little sad at witnessing this situation with out own eyes, but alas, we understand you are all too far gone now to salvage any shred of manners or chivalry.
So I'm afraid, you motley crew, we have no choice now, but to ban you from our sofa and our excellent hospitality for the foreseeable future.
It was also decided to install our new sign outside the front gate in a prominent position.
We trust you will comply.
Toodle pip chaps.
21-05-2019, 09:43 PM
22494
Re: Last to post wins
Originally Posted by Mups
->
We lovely ladies had our committee meeting today, and unanimously came to the conclusion there are no real gentlemen around these days.We felt a little sad at witnessing this situation with out own eyes, but alas, we understand you are all too far gone now to salvage any shred of manners or chivalry.
So I'm afraid, you motley crew, we have no choice now, but to ban you from our sofa and our excellent hospitality for the foreseeable future.
It was also decided to install our new sign outside the front gate in a prominent position.
We trust you will comply.
Toodle pip chaps.
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