Re: Leisurely Scribbles (part 5)

Thanks for dropping in Surfer.
We are missing some great contributors, but we try to soldier on, a bit of silly diversion can do no harm in these days of uncertainty and fear.

Talking about bore holes Spitty, I see you noticed that things on the atom crashing scene have gone very quiet, so did I, I was expecting great things to emerge from those experiments, but not a bleep outa them for over two years now, maybe the grants ran out and they sent all the chancers home with big bonuses and a pension, and to cap it all we still don’t know what happened to Higgs Bottom, you’d think they’d have the decency to give out a statement, even it if was only to say “After great expense and intensive research over ten years, we have finally reached the conclusion that Mr. Higgs definitely has a boil on his bottom” Talk about money for old rope.

“But how do you keep your mouth healthy?” What an annoying ad that is on the TV.
When we were kids the short answer to that would be to keep your mouth shut and don’t give any cheek, at least that way you didn’t get a fat lip from your parents and your mouth remained intact and healthy, children should be seen and not heard was all the rage back then.
Come to think of it, that’s probably why my generation can’t stop talking now, sort of making up for all the time we were ’overseen’, but never heard.

If you think I’m bad for repeating old jokes then you’ll be glad you didn’t know a former employer of mine.
He was not one for jokes really, too fond of money, but he had made this one up all by himself and thought it was the funniest thing since a ‘B’ actor became president of the USA.
In the big workshop where all the benches were there was a wood carving hanging about the exit door, it featured St. Joseph the carpenter and the child Jesus at work, Joseph was chiselling away on a piece of wood.
We used to get a lot of American buyers in and he would show them around to see how the stuff was made, good for business, when the tour was over and they came to the exit he would point to the carving above the door, and in his false American accent say.
“Hey you guys, see that Joseph fella? well I’m gonna fire him, he’s been on that same bit of wood for the past ten years”
Then he’d let out his loud donkey he-haw laugh, which is the same in any accent.
Christ i must have heard that joke about 100 times.

Re: Leisurely Scribbles (part 5)

I was double crossed recently by a ‘friend’ of the wife, a long story so I won’t go into it, anyway I was disappointed and saddened to say the least, but that’s life and I’ll get over it, i never hold grudges.

“Double crossed”
We don’t hear that now as much as we did before, they have other names for that sort of thing now ‘conned’ springs to mind. It was used lots of times in cowboy and gangster films, like “I think he double crossed us Sheriff, lets get a posse together and head him off at the pass”
I suppose it happens a lot in romantic associations too.
I was just wondering where the expression came from, is it of American or British origin?
Have you ever been double crossed?


Speaking of being double crossed, Al Capone was having a meeting with his mob captains on the 8th storey of an office block in Chicago, the meeting was to be a brief one as Al had to catch an afternoon train to New York.
Unknown to anyone, a large white cat armed with a machine gun was creeping up the drainpipe of the tall building with the intention of rubbing out old Alphonse, the cat was a specially trained FBI agent and they got a tip off as to where Capone was having his meeting.
The cat burst into the room through the large window and opened up with the machine gun, several of Al’s top men were shot, but Al managed to duck under a heavy oak desk, shouting at his boys to ‘get that f…ing cat”
One of Al’s men had been stationed at the main entrance and seen the cat slipping down the pipe, he nabbed him, disarmed him and then took him up to the 8th floor, when he got there he pushes in the door, holds the cat up high by the scruff of the neck and says
“Pardon me boss, is this the cat that tried to shoot you?”

I think it’s them new tablets i’m on for me nerves, them little oval yellow lads, I’ll have to ask the doc to try something else because they’re obviously not working, it’s worse I’m gettin.

Re: Leisurely Scribbles (part 5)

Got the eighth floor bit and chattanooga choo choo, but, was expecting something about nine lives, numbers rule, unfortunately.

Re: Leisurely Scribbles (part 5)

Re: Leisurely Scribbles (part 5)

Cat’s with nine lives, yes that would explain why they don’t do life insurance for cats, paying out nine times is a bit too much to expect.
Numbers mean little to me Spitty, never even done the lotto, I’m far luckier with horses, they owe me nothing, over all the years I’m still ahead stake wise.

Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia is the fear of long words, honestly!, not the fear of Hippos as one would be forgiven for thinking, then again I believe Hippo is the Greek word for horse, and I’ve backed a few horses that ran like Hippos in me day, but all names of race horses are restricted to 18 letters by the racing association, anyway I’m rambling again, back to the fear bit.

This fear may be more widespread than we think, considering how popular text messaging is today.
I probably have it myself, albeit very mildly because I don’t know a lot of big words to fear, mostly only the well educated get this phobia and that rules me out of any danger from it.

My brother in law (who went to college and is now a dentist) had it badly, but he’s grand now after receiving treatment for it at a specialist clinic.
The hardest part was to get him to go into the clinic in the first place, we eventually persuaded him it was for his own good and that of his family, but you can imagine the state he got into when we got out of the car, walked up the path to the entrance, and there in huge letters above the door was “ Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia Clinic”, the screams outta him was something else, he was only fit to be tied, and he was, we eventually managed to get him in when the two attendants supplied a strong chain and padlock to wrap him up in and we dragged him into his cell, sorry room.
This clinic was in Wales beside a railway station, it was the only clinic we could find who treated this ailment, when the brother in law woke up the next morning he looked out the back window and saw the name of the train station on a sign, it was llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysilio gogogoch. He was knocked out cold for a week after that shock.
But I think that lettering is all part of the cure plan, same as when folks with acrophobia are confronted with a huge Spider as part of their treatment.

Who remembers this song about a fella who couldn’t get rid of his cat?

Re: Leisurely Scribbles (part 5)

Jem, who in your Bubble would you trust, in a Specialized Clinic, these folks must come from a more Trustable Place, maybe, the National Trust.

Re: Leisurely Scribbles (part 5)

I think we all have our own little bubble Spitty, some have bigger bubbles than others, and want to burst them over other peoples heads, but I’m quite content with my little one, as long as I don’t get any bubbles on me backside I’m comfortable with that.
RJ had his own little planet called “Greendor” where he would retreat when he wanted to get away from it all.
Seriously, I would trust most folks (with the exception of politicians, proven liars, and child molesters} and would continue to trust them until they gave me cause not to.


Phyllis and me celebrated our 55th wedding anniversary earlier this month, all very quietly at home with just the two of us, same as we started out… just the two of us. She had prepared a lovely dinner and we had bought a bottle of champagne to wash it all down.

The daughter had found an old scratchy photo of when we were leaving the hotel for our honeymoon, Phyllis was 20 then and I was 19, unknown to us she (the daughter) had it enlarged and mounted on a canvas and wood frame, she dropped it into us when she collected it from the shop yesterday, it’s about 12”x12” and it now hangs on the wall facing some other antiques photos, well they say anything over 50 years old is an antique, that makes both of us an antique and a half.

Yes, 55 years in the saddle now, and I’d gladly do it all again, I sympathise with those who have lost long life partners and thank God that I still have mine.
Oh where have all those days gone.

Heres Luke Kelly singing that great Kinks song “Thank you for the days”, unusual for Kelly to sing a song like this, but I’ve heard him do a great job singing “Light my Fire” in the Abbey Tavern in Howth many years ago.


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Re: Leisurely Scribbles (part 5)

Have dogs got accents?
Let me explain what I’m trying to say.
A married couple moved into the house next door about six months ago, lovely couple with two small kids, they hail from Mauritius. They had a little dog, only a pup, when they moved in first, I think it’s a boxer but I wouldn’t know, just that it has a very ugly face on it.
My dog, a handsome little chap I might add, starting barking every time the boxer pup was out in their back garden and the pup would bark back at him.
Now roll on six months and yerman’s dog sounds the very same as my dog, it’s hard to tell which dog is barking mine or his, very confusing, seems like the dog next door has acquired a Dublin accent, God help the poor thing if they ever bring him back to Mauritius, the dogs there will never understand a bark he utters.

More dogs.
I saw a man pass by our house the other day with a strange looking dog on a lead, the dog was as big as a small donkey and was covered with curly redish hair, don’t ask me the name of the breed as I’m hopeless at that.
Anyway I googled strange dogs and I was surprised at all the different breeds, some of the poor creatures look like aliens from another world, like this one below called a ‘Komodor’, or Hungarian sheepdog, big lad ain’t he.
A doggie poo bag would be no good if you took this fella for a walk on the street, you’d need a mini skip, seeing it in a field it looks like a low haystack with legs.

Re: Leisurely Scribbles (part 5)

St Mary's Chapel of Ease, also known as "The Black Church", is a former chapel in Dublin. Now deconsecrated, it was a church of the Church of Ireland located on St Mary's Place, Broadstone, Dublin. It is constructed from local calp limestone which takes on a dark hue when wet. This is the origin of the building's nickname.
My grandmother’s house was located at the back of the black church, the brother and me spent most of our childhood in her house. It always was and still is a sinister looking place and I’m surprised that it was never used in the making of horror films, it’s ideal. It was sold to the council in the 60’s and used for various photographic and art exhibitions until fairly recently, I believe it’s let out as business offices now.
It was believed that if you ran around the church three times at midnight, the devil would appear and steal your soul.

Well that’s not true because the brother and me sneaked out of the house one midnight and each of us ran around it three times, me first, I was always the test pilot for my older brother, none of us saw the devil and we crept back into the house and then into bed disappointed, muttering “Why do grown ups tell so many lies?”
Having said that, I would most likely see the devil if I tried it today, not being used to running, except when being chased by dissatisfied customers , I’d surely have a heart attack and be face to face with him in no time at all.

Re: Leisurely Scribbles (part 5)

Why the assumption the devil is a Geezer?