Re: Pickled Eggs.

Dear Mr. Tpin ~ My oh my. . . I would never thought it possible to do that with a pickled egg. You are a genius.
Apricot and I had to watch it twice!

Re: Pickled Eggs.

I was looking forward to the .......well, the badge made in China of course. I'm getting a bit angry though about the changes being made in the delivery department. So, it's a mankini now? I could have 'em for false representation I think.

Re: Pickled Eggs.

Dear Ms Emerald,
Unfortunately we are unable to deal with complaint at this moment in time, our complaints department is fully committed to dealing with a rash of complaints from one Ms Apricot, maybe you could meet up somewhere nice with the harridan and have coffee and cupcakes whilst discussing our inadequacies. Once again we thank you for contacting us.

Mr Rehab, ex Customer Complaints Manager, c/o Windy Willows Rest Home for the Clinically Depressed.

Re: Pickled Eggs.

I read that Mr Rehab, I think you an absolute beast .
You will never ever get my business again and I mean that.
You can stick your badge up your pipe , so there
My brother will be round later for a "Chat".

Re: Pickled Eggs.

It WAS good though , you have to admit Mups.
Even though it made us blush like billio.

Re: Pickled Eggs.

Dear Mr Eggs R Us
As a teacher in a Secondary school I feel that educating impressionable young minds to the dangers of Internet predators is of utmost importance.
I'm sure you will be of like mind and as such would deem it your duty to post Mr Tpin's dvd on to me, before returning it to its original owner.
Although difficult to watch I am sure the pupils will learn from the experience and will probably go on to share the perils amongst their peers via Snapchat and Instagram.

Besides which I could do with a good laugh

Yours sincerely
Mrs Hope Nprayforit

PIckle your walnuts Cottage
Desperatesville
Co. Mayooneverything

Ps. Exactly how small is the mankini?



Pps Have you ever been for a Brazilian?

Re: Pickled Eggs.

My mind boggled like it has never boggled before Apricot.
Mr. Tpin is soooooo inventive and agile.

Re: Pickled Eggs.

Dear Ms Rhian,
May I direct your query to Mr Pervs R Us Tpin, who I am sure will be able to assist you, you little minx!
Further to Q1, tiny would be an exaggeration
Q2 ...smoother than a baby's bum,
I hope the above fulfills your quest for knowledge.

Rehab, Stud, Bon Vivant, International Lover, World Traveller, Casual Hero, Soldier of Fortune, philosopher and all round good egg.

Wars fought, Tigers Tamed, Revolutions started, Alligators castrated, Bars emptied, Uprising quelled, Virgins converted, Orgies organised and Computers verified.

Re: Pickled Eggs.

Dear Mr. Eggs R Us,
I am afraid you are giving us serious cause for concern regarding your multiple qualifications.

I feel obliged to contact Mr. Dom Littlewood of Rogue Traders fame, to investigate your company on our behalf, and thought it only reasonable to inform you of this first.

I can well imagine you taming tigers, castrating alligators, quelling uprisings, and possibly even organising orgies, but serious doubts have been raised about the "Stud" qualification claim and I would be obliged if you would clarify this and provide a copy of your Certificate along with date of qualifying. Anything pre-1980 will be regarded as obsolete and would require updating.
Any photocopies of Customer Recommendations would also be appreciated, and these can be sent to Ms. Rhian, Apricot, Ms Apricot and myself at "Pickle Your Walnuts Cottage" if you prefer.

We await your references with anticipation.


Ms Mups

Re: Pickled Eggs.

Stone me Mups , aint it the truth.
I don"t think we should share with the OFFS though ,they are very sensitive. Might bring on an attack of the vapours.