25-07-2021, 09:34 PM
11
Re: For the sake of the children
Originally Posted by Last Tango
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I had the pleasure of meeting up with a long time friend whom I had not seen face to face due to the restrictions, During our chat I sensed that she seemed rather 'down' To cut a long story short, it seems she and her husband of 30+ plus years had only been staying together for the sake of the children and now they are still doing that for the sake of the it grandchildren.I feel so sad for her and wonder if anyone else has experienced this?
25-07-2021, 09:35 PM
12
Re: For the sake of the children
Originally Posted by Right Now
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I agree, and have long since divorced....I am so much happier.
I would say, divorce is the worst thing, especially for children as it isn’t fair for them to be caught up in it all.
25-07-2021, 10:35 PM
13
Re: For the sake of the children
Originally Posted by Silver Tabby
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I believe it is better to come from a broken home than to live in one - so, no, I would not stay with someone I could no longer love or respect just 'for the sake of the children'. In fact children are often more resilient than we give them credit for.
My thoughts exactly, Tabby.
Many years ago, when my marriage was over, I explained to Mum & Dad we were splitting up and Mum's first reaction was worry about our young son.
I clearly remember I said to her exactly what you've just said Tabs - "Better to come from a broken home than to live in one."
In my view it is better for kids to live with one parent who loves them, than live in a bad atmosphere with two who are always arguing.
I still believe that to be true.
I think because we split before things got too acrimonious, we were happy to stay in touch and remain good friends for the next 40 odd years or so, until he sadly died not long ago. And in all those years, even after divorce, he still remembered my birthday every single year!
I still miss him in a lot of ways.
25-07-2021, 10:36 PM
14
Re: For the sake of the children
Originally Posted by Harbal
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It sounds to me that they are just looking for excuses to stay together. They will be claiming it's for the sake of the cat next. 
Seems like that to me too.
25-07-2021, 11:09 PM
15
Re: For the sake of the children
Originally Posted by Baz46
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As resilient as children may be, they also have a lot of problems in ways adults would not even think of, unless those adults are also from broken homes. What often seemed to be very trivial to me, my offspring have informed me was a very big deal to them, emotionally. None of what happens with children when marriages break down is helped when the parent with custody tries all ways to prevent any relationship with the other parent. That screws children up emotionally and there's nothing the absent parent can do to prevent it, even the Courts and their welfare officers will not help. The absent parent even risks losing any contact with the children, that is (or was in those times) quite obvious from the way custody was awarded. 
26-07-2021, 12:53 AM
16
Re: For the sake of the children
Originally Posted by Artangel
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RN, l am very happy for you as it takes a lot of guts and tears to end a marriage.I would say, divorce is the worst thing, especially for children as it isn’t fair for them to be caught up in it all.
I have been happily single for over a decade. It was the right decision for me.
26-07-2021, 07:40 AM
17
Re: For the sake of the children
Originally Posted by Harbal
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It sounds to me that they are just looking for excuses to stay together. They will be claiming it's for the sake of the cat next.
26-07-2021, 09:02 AM
18
Re: For the sake of the children
Originally Posted by eccles
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I don't understand why any couple would stay together for the sake of grandchildren, but there must be loads of couples who still stop together for financial reasons, or out of habit.
26-07-2021, 09:15 AM
19
Re: For the sake of the children
Originally Posted by eccles
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I don't understand why any couple would stay together for the sake of grandchildren, but there must be loads of couples who still stop together for financial reasons, or out of habit.
Having got rid of our two older siblings,when sent to church twice every sunday to get us out of the way, my sister and I used to pray that our evil stepmother would disappear so we could be spared a continuing life of emotional and physical abuse from her . Unfortunately she wasn't going to let go of her newly acquired home and meal ticket
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