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17-12-2018, 10:10 PM
1

The Boob Test

"Now, this is what you do," Grandma Daisy said. "I realize this is odd, but you'll see what I mean. Lift your boob over your head."

"My boob?" Aubree said. "It isn't that long."

"It is if you duck you head. You inherited your Grandma Ester's boobs. She was my grandmother, on my father's side, you know. Now, she was a woman with all kinds of talents. My mother told me she could squirt the milk a good ten feet. She'd tell the youngster, which ever one was the baby at the time, to open her mouth. Grandma would back up and aim it. It became quite a game. She had ten kids. All of them lived. That was quite an accomplishment in her day. Anyway, here let me show you what I mean."

"I always thought I inherited yours," Aubree said.

"You're are considerably larger than mine ever were. Grandma Ester considered them a nuisance. So she set out to see if they could be useful for anything besides feeding babies and keeping Grandpa contented. Go on now, duck your head. Move over here to the rocking chair. I had to bring it, you know. It's a family heirloom. It rightly belongs with you." Grandma Daisy pulled the rocking chair over close to the bed in the master bedroom. "Go on now, sit down, pull off your top, bend yourself in the middle and rock forward. That's it. Now take off your bra and dangle your boobs over your head."

"My belly is in the way," Aubree said.

"Wiggle about a bit."

"What do you know, it works."

"Of course, it works. I've never lead you astray, have I?"

"Well, actually.... What's the point of this?"

Grandma's face broke out in twinkles. "Just for the fun of it. It's just to show you they're more than just functional playthings. They serve another purpose."

"Oh, and what's that?"

"Every time you think you've got things figured out, do the boob test. Put your head down between them like this and stand up all of a sudden. Go on, now do it."

Aubree did so and nearly toppled forward.

"There you have it," Grandma said.

"What is it I have? All it did was make me dizzy."

"That's the importance of most things we fret about. If we give them the boob test, we discover they aren't worth worrying about. It's more important to keep a level head about everything. When something bothers you, just let it flow on through you. Center yourself in your heart, calm yourself and don't lose your head. Be patient with yourself if you continue to get upset, and know that you will and can over come anything. Eventually you'll learn to be calm under all circumstance, but it takes practice."

"So the boob test is...."

"A leveling agent."
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17-12-2018, 10:22 PM
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Re: The Boob Test

I'm wondering whether this also works with men and erm other "dangly bits" ...
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17-12-2018, 10:24 PM
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Re: The Boob Test

If one becomes proficient in this thought pattern, will one get a "Booby Prize"?
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17-12-2018, 10:26 PM
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Re: The Boob Test

Originally Posted by AnnieS ->
I'm wondering whether this also works with men and erm other "dangly bits" ...
It could be difficult for them to hang their heads between those dangly bits. If you find someone willing to give it a try, let me know. Grin.
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18-12-2018, 03:45 AM
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Re: The Boob Test

Originally Posted by spitfire ->
If one becomes proficient in this thought pattern, will one get a "Booby Prize"?
Absolutely.

This is actually a scene from the novel I'm currently working on.
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18-12-2018, 06:07 AM
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Re: The Boob Test

it's just a load of tits!
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18-12-2018, 06:21 PM
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Re: The Boob Test

I used to work with this woman whose boobs were way too huge. She was in her mid 50s at the time. She called them her curse. She said when she talked to men, that was all they ever looked at. They didn't look in her eyes. She did not flaunt them. So when I write stories I sometimes play with that idea.
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