Shampoo
An elderley lady went to stay with her friend for a few days.
When she is in the bathroom one morning, her friend calls up "Did you find the shampoo Edna?"
Edna answers: "Yes, but it's for dry hair and I've just wet mine".
* * * * * * * *
Two drunks staggering home from the pub:
"Freddie, did you know Christmas is on a Friday this year?"
Freddie says: "Let's hope it's not the 13th then".