19-01-2018, 10:43 PM
4431
Re: Leisurely Scribbles (part 5)
Never work with animals or children.
You may have noticed that I often refer to sayings and wisdom given to me by my dear departed Grampy. He passed on from this mortal coil fifty five years ago and yet his witticisms and good advice live on.
He was immensely well informed. Art, Politics, Education, Finance. All these areas of human endeavour were familiar to him. Name a subject and he had an opinion on it. He has over the course of my adult life, equipped me with a readymade treasure house of points of view, irrefutable facts, and acutely observed muses and exquisitely witty conversation stoppers. , terminological in exactitudes. Regrettably some were, yes, only some. Now it is time for his valediction. As my Grampy used to say, "If it sounds too good to be true, it probably is" On my fifth birthday, I very cleverly asked him for a magic wand. Without hesitating he replied "But you are not old enough to have a magic wand" Even now I think that was incredibly accurate, and an uncanny prophecy relating to a generation to come after his, wanting it all and wanting it now. I digress.
There is no doubt in my mind that in truth, he may have actually said some, if not all of those priceless sayings. Certainly, he thought of saying some of those things. That is to say, he may have used some of those words. Not of course necessarily in the exact order have that I have used them, or in the same context. This may be a clue to the gradual revelation of this my confession to you. I was very fond of my Gramps. I would like people to think that he was an oracle and general fount of wisdom and knowledge. For example he was going to tell me how the camel got his hump and how the leopard his spots. This was when I was only ten years old. Many years later I found out that, Rudyard Kipling pinched Grammy’s idea and published it. The more astute reader, or in today's circumstances, listener, will by now be forming their own view of events.
Be generous. As a spotty and painfully thin, callow youth I discovered the gravitas afforded an otherwise lightweight verbal aside, by a well timed , and appropriate,
"As my old Grampy used to say”,
This ruse often carried the debate. The addition of stroking my spiky chin and nodding silently, yet sagely helped enormously. My boldness grew with each passing sparkling quotation; I became addicted to and dependent on this ruse. ... One day I announced grandly. "My Gramps told me to never work with animals or children" Silence. Drat, of course it was actually said by that actor chap, W. C. Fields. This is where I came in. Years ago I attributed any worthwhile saying to my Gramps, no matter who originally spouted forth, Gramps received the credit. '
In the ominous silence that followed I heard myself repeating, “My Gramps told me to never work with animals or children"
I do not why I said that, even as I spoke, I knew it was not true. I have now grown up and let Gramps rest in peace. As my Gramps used to say. "
Robert, what are you waffling on about now? “Bless ....