I need this day over.

Today is a horrible day for me and my family. It is a day that 4 years ago saw my darling sister die suddenly and as I never deal well with milestones, birthdays, christmas, anniversaries etc I'm finding today really hard.

Also I cared for a lady in her own home for 2 years until recently and she has had a terrible fall and broke her hip and her arm, she also has dementia. I went to see her in hospital last weekend and she was sitting up in bed and we had some chuckles talking about the things we've laughed about in my time caring for her. Then today her daughter has messaged me to tell me she is on end of life, her liver is failing and they have stopped all medications except pain relief. I'm so sorry to hear my friend is dying, she's a beautiful woman and she has such a fabulous sense of humour and I care for her a lot.

Then when I went to visit my dad this afternoon he started telling me what i must do when he dies, phonecalls, insurance etc and I just broke down, I can't even think about my dad leaving me and it breaks my heart knowing that of course he will pass one day. I always try not to break down in front of my dad because I don't want him to feel sad at me being so sad but I just couldn't help it and I'm so mad with myself for not being stronger whilst i was with my dad.

I'm feeling overwhelmingly sad and it just all feels too much today and I can't stop crying, I felt so so sad to find out today from her son that Deylon had passed on too although I did have a feeling she had died when I didn't get a response from a PM I sent her a while back.

I'm generally a happy and fun person but today is just overwhelming me, I'll be glad when this day is over.

Thank you so much for 'listening' as allowing me to write my feeling down here is somehow helping me tonight.

Re: I need this day over.

Sending you a big *hug*, LQ .....x

Re: I need this day over.

Thank you mags, all hugs welcome for sure. x

Re: I need this day over.

I feel your pain dear Lion.....I am crying some tears with you. This is a very hard time for you.......

Love, Blue..........

Re: I need this day over.

I cannot forget, just a week ago, when I was struggling with my hard time, you supported me with this lovely poem, and now I would like to give it back to you, in hopes that it will also help you as much as it helped me.........x

Thinking of you today my dear friend Blue, I'm so sorry for your sadness today. Big hugs for you. Here is a poem I wrote, I hope it will give you some kind of comfort.

I Didn’t Die

I know you will be sad
I left the place you know
I walked the stairs to Heaven
It was my time to go

My passing was so sudden
God came and took my hand
I didn't suffer, I'm not in pain
I'm in a beautiful land

For those I left behind
I know you'll shed a tear
But now I am with God at peace
I'm very happy here

Remember me with happiness
The good times that we shared
Also please remember
For you how much I cared

You'll see a shining star
Each night up in the sky
That star is me, saying hello
You see I didn't die

© Lion Queen

Re: I need this day over.

Times like this are extremely difficult to cope with and your friends on here will help you through these dark days. The sun WILL shine again. God bless you.

Re: I need this day over.

LQ you have my sympathies.
It's hard.

Re: I need this day over.

Oh Queeny you are so like me.
It is so close to my being tearful over my baby brother, my Mum, then my Dad's Birthdays. I can't help feeling this way.
I will be the same on Boxing day, the day I lost my only sibling. We can comfort eachother my lovely friend. X

Re: I need this day over.

Oh Lion Queen...I am so very sorry, that you're having such an overwhelming day of sadness... I hope these help a little...

Re: I need this day over.

Thank you Blue for your kind words