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Mups
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Mups is offline
Northamptonshire
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06-06-2017, 09:55 AM
21

Re: Jokes for Ladies (Sisters' Revenge!)

Of course women don't work as hard as men -
They get it right first time.
May
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SCOTLAND
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06-06-2017, 10:56 AM
22

Re: Jokes for Ladies (Sisters' Revenge!)

Wedding Tombstones




A husband and his wife had a bitter quarrel on the day of their 40th wedding anniversary.

The husband yells, "When you die, I'm getting you a headstone that reads: 'Here Lies My Wife - Cold As Ever'."

"Yeah," she replies, "When you die, I'm getting you a headstone reads: 'Here Lies My Husband - Stiff At Last.'"
Boozercruiser
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Wales
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06-06-2017, 01:09 PM
23

Re: Jokes for Ladies (Sisters' Revenge!)

Originally Posted by May ->
Wedding Tombstones




A husband and his wife had a bitter quarrel on the day of their 40th wedding anniversary.

The husband yells, "When you die, I'm getting you a headstone that reads: 'Here Lies My Wife - Cold As Ever'."

"Yeah," she replies, "When you die, I'm getting you a headstone reads: 'Here Lies My Husband - Stiff At Last.'"
At least he died happy!
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Mups
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Mups is offline
Northamptonshire
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06-06-2017, 01:14 PM
24

Re: Jokes for Ladies (Sisters' Revenge!)

Originally Posted by May ->
Wedding Tombstones




A husband and his wife had a bitter quarrel on the day of their 40th wedding anniversary.

The husband yells, "When you die, I'm getting you a headstone that reads: 'Here Lies My Wife - Cold As Ever'."

"Yeah," she replies, "When you die, I'm getting you a headstone reads: 'Here Lies My Husband - Stiff At Last.'"

That made me laugh, May.
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JBR
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Cheshire, UK
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07-06-2017, 12:08 AM
25

Re: Jokes for Ladies (Sisters' Revenge!)

Sorry to intrude on your gender-specific thread, but I have an appropriate one to add.

Two women were having lunch together and discussing the merits of cosmetic surgery.

The first woman says, "I need to be honest with you. I'm getting a boob job."

The second one says, "Oh, that's nothing. I'm thinking of having my arsehole bleached!"

To which the first replies, "Whoa, I just can't picture your husband as a blond."
lovemyboys
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Canada
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07-06-2017, 07:37 AM
26

Re: Jokes for Ladies (Sisters' Revenge!)

Three men died, but before God would let them into heaven, God gave them a chance to come back as anything they wanted.

The first guy said, “I want to come back as myself, but 100 times smarter.” So God made him 100 times smarter.

The second guy said, “I want to be better than that guy, make me 1000 times smarter.” So God made him 1000 times smarter.

The last guy decided he would be the best. So he said, “God, make me better than both of them, make me 1,000,000 times smarter.”

So God made him a woman.
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Mups
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07-06-2017, 01:49 PM
27

Re: Jokes for Ladies (Sisters' Revenge!)

"Cash, check or charge?" I asked, after folding items the woman wished to purchase. As she fumbled for her wallet I noticed a remote control for a television set in her purse.

"So, do you always carry your TV remote?" I asked.

"No," she replied, "but my husband refused to come shopping with me, so I figured this was the most legal evil thing I could do to him."
TessA
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UK
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07-06-2017, 04:40 PM
28

Re: Jokes for Ladies (Sisters' Revenge!)

We don't mind who posts here, it's just a few jokes from the female point of view.
If it brings out your feminine side JBR the feel free!
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JBR
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Cheshire, UK
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07-06-2017, 08:36 PM
29

Re: Jokes for Ladies (Sisters' Revenge!)

Originally Posted by TessA ->
We don't mind who posts here, it's just a few jokes from the female point of view.
If it brings out your feminine side JBR the feel free!
I think the important thing is that I can laugh at myself!
Mups's Avatar
Mups
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Mups is offline
Northamptonshire
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09-06-2017, 03:38 PM
30

Re: Jokes for Ladies (Sisters' Revenge!)

What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name?

You didn’t hold the pillow down long enough.
 
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