19-09-2020, 05:18 PM
51
Re: condolences
Originally Posted by morticia
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it's a natural instinct to offer comfort .... Especially if he held out his arms.Whilst some would deem it too risky it's also an awful time to be left alone, to grieve alone ... When a bit of human contact is just what he needed.
Don't feel too bad about it.
19-09-2020, 05:19 PM
52
Re: condolences
Originally Posted by mups
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that is so sad paula, having to think twice before we can comfort another human being in their time of grief.I think i would have done the same as you without thinking, poor old chap.
No good worrying about it now, lets just hope he felt a little peace and comfort from your company, if only for a short time, and that you both stay safe.
19-09-2020, 05:21 PM
53
Re: condolences
Originally Posted by OldGreyFox
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I would have done the same Paula, there are some things bigger than Covid, and human emotion is one of them....If my daughter was in need of a hug, even if she was infected with Covid, I would respond. What good is life without the love of your family and friends? The BBC have done a good job with their fear mongering!
19-09-2020, 05:22 PM
54
Re: condolences
Originally Posted by Artangel
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I am not paranoid at all! How many of you shop online these days, lots on here do. I am in the shops lots of times a week, l walk most days. If l was paranoid, I wouldn’t leave the house. So please don’t accuse me of paranoia.
All those that would hug someone, are you on call to help them? Do you cook them something? Ask if you can help in some way? Ring them or call on them each day to see that they are ok?
No, you probably don’t, yet you think your, ‘oh l am so good’ one hug will solve everything!
19-09-2020, 06:19 PM
56
Re: condolences
I am with Artangel on this one. Hugging someone who is out of your 'social bubble', 100% no no because the risks are too great. I've had a number of younger relatives who have caught the virus, they tested positive, had extremely bad flu like symptoms, isolated for 14 days and all well after that. I do not know what all my relatives do on a day to day basis, who they mix with, who they meet up with.I've got too many elderly relatives who I know would die if they caught the virus and thus I have been in that exact situation where a relative has reached out with open arms for what I've assumed to be wanting a hug and I've backed off and just held their hands (both of us gloved and masked of course). I've had to work all through the pandemic whilst other close family members have been furloughed and thus they have been able to create there own 'social bubble' where then can still hug one another but as soon as I or anyone else from outside of that social bubble enter, it's no touching regardless of how much anyone of them want a hug.
A very close family died recently, funeral was only a couple of weeks ago. During the relatives diminishing weeks and days, only the relatives partner was allowed to visit but even then no hugs were allowed. At the funeral and then at the wake, no hugs even though you could see many many relatives in emotional pain.
It's been extremely hard this year for my family due to the virus and the restrictions placed upon everybody but we have all educated ourselves on the dangers that the virus could bring to the family due to how many of the family are in the high risk category.
I had to see a very close family member die before my eyes, a person who I was not able to hug, a person who wanted hugs but i was not allowed to by the medical staff who was looking after my relative. It hurts knowing the person passed away without being able to have hugs for comfort in the last few days they had left. It still hurts now and I am sure it will hurt for a very long time BUT i know the reasons why myself and other family members were not allowed to hug and they also understood the reasons why too.
Due to the virus I've not been able to hug ANY family member since the pandemic was issued. I know hugs give comfort but my family knows the risks of someone from outside of their 'social bubble' hugging them would be extremely risky.
So in short, conclusion, would i step back, walk away from a pair of out stretched arms, yes of course, I've even had too. If I was not able to do so with very very close family members, I am certainly not going to do so with friends or close acquaintances.
19-09-2020, 07:14 PM
57
Re: condolences
Dodge, I don't think anyone has supported hugging or encouraged laxity in Covid carefulness .... just that it was instinctive to hug back and show some care and compassion and certainly not to castigate anyone for showing empathy to someone in distress.It does make one wonder how people will be living if Covid is here to stay, which I think it is.
It could be a long long time before family members can hug.
There's not going to be a speedy vaccine and it ain't going to vanish overnight.
If anything, I think it's something we're going to have to learn to live with, take risks with or the economy is going to be shot to pieces and the amount of suffering that hardship will cause could be incalculable.
19-09-2020, 07:25 PM
58
Re: condolences
Originally Posted by Morticia
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Dodge, I don't think anyone has supported hugging or encouraged laxity in Covid carefulness .... just that it was instinctive to hug back and show some care and compassion and certainly not to castigate anyone for showing empathy to someone in distress.19-09-2020, 08:09 PM
59
Re: condolences
Originally Posted by Morticia
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Dodge, I don't think anyone has supported hugging or encouraged laxity in Covid carefulness .... just that it was instinctive to hug back and show some care and compassion and certainly not to castigate anyone for showing empathy to someone in distress.It does make one wonder how people will be living if Covid is here to stay, which I think it is.
It could be a long long time before family members can hug.
There's not going to be a speedy vaccine and it ain't going to vanish overnight.
If anything, I think it's something we're going to have to learn to live with, take risks with or the economy is going to be shot to pieces and the amount of suffering that hardship will cause could be incalculable.
If someone is outside of your social bubble you do not hug them, no if's or but's. If hugging is your natural response in such situations then you must learn to refrain from that natural response. This issue with the virus is very serious and EVRYONE in the country needs to treat it as such because the consequences can be dire for all.
19-09-2020, 08:14 PM
60
Re: condolences
I beg to differ .... my understanding was that many members said ' they would probably have done the same thing ' ..... that is to say, responded to someone reaching out for a hug. Someone who is grieving and upset.If you think , as you claim, that that means some members here would wantonly or irresponsibly ignore Covid rules .... well, then you are maligning them without good cause.
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