09-12-2015, 10:04 AM
21
Re: When 'friends' attack, how do you react ?
I didn't think friends usually verbally attacked each other in any serious way or they wouldn't be friends.The whole raison d'ętre of a relationship with friends is that they know practically everything about each other and make allowances for those things with which they disagree so they don't verbally attack each other.
09-12-2015, 10:06 AM
22
Re: When 'friends' attack, how do you react ?
I have experienced this. We have virtually lifelong friends who moved here to be near us. For a time things were as usual then suddenly they changed. I got a phone call from the wife of our friends and she was literally ranting and raving at me, I had said this, I had said that, etc etc, I hadnīt ever said any of the things she was accusing me of, but I did know who the stirrer was. I just held the phone and then said, "Iīll leave it with you, you will soon find out the truth" and I put the phone down.Well, they did find out the truth when they realised the person they had made a friend of was indeed a vicious stirrer. However it took almost 6 years for our friends to apologise to me. I know they had wanted to on more than one occasion but I guess pride got in the way. Eventually the wife of our friends came to the house and she apologised, I know her very well and I know how difficult that was for her, now things are as they always used to be, apart from the fact I am just a little more wary. I didnīt retaliate at the time because there was no point and it isnīt my way. I knew the truth and at the time our friend wouldnīt have believe me, better she found out for herself, which of course she did, as did others who had made a friend of this certain stirrer. Apart from that I canīt see the point in wasting energy arguing and shouting back at people who always have to be right, even when they are wrong, walk away and leave them to it is my preferred method.
09-12-2015, 11:45 AM
24
Re: When 'friends' attack, how do you react ?
I haven't got many friends but the few that I do call friends are not in the habit of 'Going off on one' but I value their friendship so much that I would try to calm them down or talk it through. The type of people that you consider friends have certain qualities that make them pleasant to be with and are probably like minded so they (As I) would think long and hard before getting aggressive with each other. I hate confrontation and only being a small guy could not intimidate anyone with my physical presence, so that's probably why I am such a good runner.I would rather back down to a friend and admit defeat, than lose that friend forever.
It could be dealt with later when all have calmed down.
Old friends are too valuable to lose over a silly tiff, and a proper friend will realise that.
09-12-2015, 01:39 PM
26
Re: When 'friends' attack, how do you react ?
I certainly wouldn't put up with verbal aggression from anyone be They Friend or acquaintance..I had to get a couple of sarcastic so-called Friends out of My Life some time ago..also a control freaking Relative...who needs Them?..
09-12-2015, 05:36 PM
28
Re: When 'friends' attack, how do you react ?
Originally Posted by eyes_of_a_painter
->
I think the raising of one's voice is a sign of weakness. Person has no intellectual response, thus needs to raise their voice trying to win the debate by intimidation
I agree with that to a point, painter.
However, it is perhaps not always showing intimidation if one raises one's voice, it can also be the opposite - desperation and fear of losing.
09-12-2015, 05:38 PM
29
Re: When 'friends' attack, how do you react ?
Originally Posted by Mr Ploppy
->
When 'friends' attack, how do you react ?I don't know yet. I've never been attacked by a friend.
I have been attacked by non friends or so called friends. My reaction always depends on the situation. I may ignore the attack, counter attack or try to figure out what made them attack me in the first place. There are just too many variables.
Should a real friend attack me, I'd probably be shocked first and then try to calmly work through it.
Go on Rachel, attack me and find out for sure.
Absolutely Plops. I agree with that.
09-12-2015, 05:56 PM
30
Re: When 'friends' attack, how do you react ?
Originally Posted by Rachel
->
Lol ... yes .. see my original post regarding the insignificance of the people who pass through my lifeI find people fascinating and 'enjoy' looking at their psyche
This I suggest is why most women, putting aside the obvious penis envy, wish they had been born male.
Not forgetting also that it is the female of the species which can be the most aggressive, so perhaps that is why the men are not responding
|
|
