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Lindyloo
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isle of wight
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19-01-2021, 10:11 PM
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Re: Do You Think You Can Change People?

Originally Posted by spitfire ->
Its no ones right to change anyone, who has the perfect perspective?
No one has - but many claim to!
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19-01-2021, 10:14 PM
12

Re: Do You Think You Can Change People?

I know, moulding folks to suit ones own agenda is a no,no.
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19-01-2021, 10:42 PM
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Re: Do You Think You Can Change People?

What if the person pretended to be a decent human being to get you and once that was accomplished, their true colours was revealed much to your horror.
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19-01-2021, 10:44 PM
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Re: Do You Think You Can Change People?

That is a danger.
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19-01-2021, 10:44 PM
15

Re: Do You Think You Can Change People?

Originally Posted by Minx ->
What if the person pretended to be a decent human being to get you and once that was accomplished, their true colours was revealed much to your horror.
Quite simple, if you don't like what you found and it's too bad to live with, you dump them!
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19-01-2021, 10:47 PM
16

Re: Do You Think You Can Change People?

Back then it was never that simple, maybe it is now.
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20-01-2021, 12:46 AM
17

Re: Do You Think You Can Change People?

I think you can change a persons habits. Example, if they smoke or don't have a regular shower, or swear all the time - plus lots of other things. Yes of course you can change these things.

However I don't think you can change a persons nature. An evil person will always be evil. A loving person always loving, a mean person always mean etc....
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20-01-2021, 12:55 AM
18

Re: Do You Think You Can Change People?

Originally Posted by Minx ->
What if the person pretended to be a decent human being to get you and once that was accomplished, their true colours was revealed much to your horror.
I would imagine, you would feel, “ terribly let down”....another layer of protection added, to the, already protected human wall.
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20-01-2021, 01:10 AM
19

Re: Do You Think You Can Change People?

Maybe I can add another perspective depending on what is meant by change. I don't think you can "change" people per se. That is I don't think you can change a person's personality or basic character once it's been formed. To do so would be like trying to unscramble an egg. You can grind a concrete block into powder but it won't set as concrete again once you add water. (I don't think) But I certainly think you can change a person's behaviour. YOu can expose them to ways of dealing with life problems that are effective and positive rather than destructive and harmful and give them skills to achieve this. One label this process has been given is Cognitive Behavioural THerapy. It is short term. It has a high success rate and it absolutely changes people. EXample: some people are violent. A percentage of these may be violent because they simply enjoy hurting people or are sadists or brutal bullies. They don't want to change and won't. So their place is in the justice system and then prison. THey may or may not change there. Who cares!.. Others are violent because they don't have the skill to handle anger in any other way. These are the ones you can work with. For what it's worth I worked with them. For years. And I can tell you with these people it is very possible to effect change.
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20-01-2021, 01:20 AM
20

Re: Do You Think You Can Change People?

Well, apparently I changed my ex husband....he accused me of turning him into a deranged psycho!!
 
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