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Robert Junior
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04-12-2014, 07:52 PM
11

Re: Leisurely Scribbles part 2

Enjoy Jem......& not so much of the OLD RJ. I'm only 66.
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04-12-2014, 08:53 PM
12

Re: Leisurely Scribbles part 2

Originally Posted by Robert Junior ->
Enjoy Jem......& not so much of the OLD RJ. I'm only 66.
Thank you young man.
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05-12-2014, 02:11 AM
13

Re: Leisurely Scribbles part 2

Right-these are just thoughts,so don't think I'm bitter.
But,I don't 'do' Facebook,or understand Twitter.
Instagram's something about pictures,I've heard,
and as for 'Selfies'-oh blimey-aren't they just absurd!

There I am,feeling smug for avoiding the hype
When suddenly I get told "Hey Pug-let's Skype!"`
My answer I won't repeat-you'd just go pale.
But ffs-I've only just mastered email!

I'm a yokel,a carrot-cruncher,a chewer of pencils.
I've no wish for an ebook or a 'tablet' with stencils.
E M Forster & Hemmingway must spin in their graves
To see how much e-porn and e-war depraves.

Everyone's a warrior-that C.O.D crap.
Or stuck to their keyboards going 'fap-fap-fap-fap'.
Oh,how I miss that long-lost era when
my idea of REAL progress....was a cartridge ink pen!

But what puts the boot in,
PROVING our downward trail;
Is that - to become a SUCCESS on the net...


....you must 'FAIL'.
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05-12-2014, 06:17 AM
14

Re: Leisurely Scribbles part 2

Pit a patter – it don’t matter
House on fire lets burn the clatter
How I like an indoor blaze
I’ll just stand and fan and wave

Here they come the men in white
Brought a jacket that’s too tight
Tell me I’ll be on the carpet
I’ve done nuffin the cat did start it!
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05-12-2014, 11:29 AM
15

Re: Leisurely Scribbles part 2

Thanks lads, cheered me up no end.
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05-12-2014, 04:00 PM
16

Re: Leisurely Scribbles part 2

The old Apple test still works.
******

When I was a lad I was told by my dad
how to differ a friend from a cad
no need in magic to dabble
it can be done with a simple apple

Cut it through and leave one side thick
then ask your friend to take his pick
if he takes the biggest one
then your friendship is truly gone.

The oldest trick in the book but it is a fair test even today, create a situation where you say you have only one apple left and you insist on sharing it so you cut it in half, well not quite half, the best way is to make the difference hardly noticeable but noticeable all the same, if he/she picks the larger bit of apple it will give you a fair idea of the nature of that person. Pity it can’t be done on a dating site for instance, might save a lot of heartache for some in the long run. Go on be honest, which bit would you pick?
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05-12-2014, 04:34 PM
17

Re: Leisurely Scribbles part 2

Oh,Jem-need you ask?
My chin hit the floor.
I'd leave YOU the apple
I'd just take the core.

The reason? Well you're a lady,y'see.
Etiquette's always been important to me.
Though I do have a motive-I'll plant the seeds over there.
Then there'll always be apples,for real friends to share!
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05-12-2014, 04:42 PM
18

Re: Leisurely Scribbles part 2

Oh Pug, much that I love your poetry
But a lady you'll never make outta me!

Me is a he!
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05-12-2014, 05:03 PM
19

Re: Leisurely Scribbles part 2

You ARE? Oh-what a waste of my charm!
For a short while I thought about chancing my arm.
For a chance of romance,with a lady of grace...
....then you go and throw THAT in my face!


So now here I sit,saddened by this mishap.
Coz the girl of my dreams-is a big hairy chap!
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06-12-2014, 06:42 AM
20

Re: Leisurely Scribbles part 2

Our Pets
The cat sat on the mantle piece
it didn't move a paw
they'd washed it in alabaster
and dried it by the door

the bird sat in the gilded cage
hanging upside down
it swung occasionally in the breeze
but didn't make a sound

the dog stood by the fire hearth
with a glazed look in its eyes
the 'dermist said "give it a week'
then varnish both its eyes

the hamster scurried around the room
looking for a meal
and then the batteries run out
and it stopped behind the screen

the rabbit looked quite lively
as it lay upon the plate
they'd forgotten to take the fur off
and it burnt whilst on the grate

Granny just sat and looked
at all this menagerie
they'd stuffed her after easter
he hand held cup with tea

me mother said :it's quieter with everyone at rest"
now go brush ya hair, bible out
to church in sunday best!
 
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