25-02-2021, 05:30 PM
2023
Re: Let's have a laugh
An Irishmen wanting to become a Priest went to see the Bishop who said "You must answer 3 questions on the Bible. 1st - Who was born in a stable?""Red Rum" he replied.
"2nd - What do you think of Damascus?"
"It kills 99% of all germs" he replied.
"3rd - What happened when the disciples went to Mount Olive?"
"That’s easy", he said, "Popeye kicked the shit out of them!!"
25-02-2021, 05:35 PM
2024
Re: Let's have a laugh
A man was dining alone in a fancy restaurant and there was a Gorgeous redhead sitting at the next table. He had been checking her out since he sat down, but lacked the nerve to talk with her. Suddenly she sneezed, and her glass eye came flying out of its socket towards the man. He reflexively reached out, grabbed it out of the air, and handed it back.'Oh my, I am so sorry,' the woman said, as she popped her eye back in place. 'Let me buy your dinner to make it up to you.'
They enjoyed a wonderful dinner together, and afterwards they went to the theatre followed by drinks. They talked, they laughed, she shared her deepest dreams and he shared his. She listened to him with interest.
After paying for everything, she asked him if he would like to come to her place for a nightcap and stay for breakfast. They had a wonderful, wonderful time.
The next morning, she cooked a gourmet meal with all the trimmings. The guy was amazed. Everything had been so incredible!
'You know,' he said, 'you are the perfect woman. Are you this nice to every guy you meet?'
'No,' she replies.
Wait for it ...
It's coming ...
The suspense is killing you, isn't it?
She said ...
'You just happened to catch my eye.'
26-02-2021, 02:06 PM
2025
Re: Let's have a laugh
Originally Posted by Percy Vere
->
An Irishmen wanting to become a Priest went to see the Bishop who said "You must answer 3 questions on the Bible. 1st - Who was born in a stable?""Red Rum" he replied.
"2nd - What do you think of Damascus?"
"It kills 99% of all germs" he replied.
"3rd - What happened when the disciples went to Mount Olive?"
"That’s easy", he said, "Popeye kicked the shit out of them!!"
26-02-2021, 02:14 PM
2026
Re: Let's have a laugh
Originally Posted by Percy Vere
->
A man was dining alone in a fancy restaurant and there was a Gorgeous redhead sitting at the next table. He had been checking her out since he sat down, but lacked the nerve to talk with her. Suddenly she sneezed, and her glass eye came flying out of its socket towards the man. He reflexively reached out, grabbed it out of the air, and handed it back.'Oh my, I am so sorry,' the woman said, as she popped her eye back in place. 'Let me buy your dinner to make it up to you.'
They enjoyed a wonderful dinner together, and afterwards they went to the theatre followed by drinks. They talked, they laughed, she shared her deepest dreams and he shared his. She listened to him with interest.
After paying for everything, she asked him if he would like to come to her place for a nightcap and stay for breakfast. They had a wonderful, wonderful time.
The next morning, she cooked a gourmet meal with all the trimmings. The guy was amazed. Everything had been so incredible!
'You know,' he said, 'you are the perfect woman. Are you this nice to every guy you meet?'
'No,' she replies.
Wait for it ...
It's coming ...
The suspense is killing you, isn't it?
She said ...
'You just happened to catch my eye.'
27-02-2021, 05:58 PM
2030
Re: Let's have a laugh
Hospital regulations require a wheel chair for patients being discharged However, while working as a student nurse, I found one elderly gentleman already dressed and sitting on the bed with a suitcase at his feet, who insisted he didn't need my help to leave the hospital.After a chat about rules being rules, he reluctantly let me wheel him to the elevator.
On the way down I asked him if his wife was meeting him.
'I don't know,' he said. 'She's still upstairs in the bathroom changing out of her hospital gown.'
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