01-03-2018, 09:38 AM
11
Re: When you fall out with a friend
Originally Posted by Floydy
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A month ago a work colleague, who has always been my best mate at work had an argument which has resulted in neither party speaking to one another.I won't go into the details of the conflict but it got very heated for a few minutes and has resulted in a difficult situation as we have to work together in the same building and cross paths. I am not one to bear a grudge against anyone, but there's that other part of me that says I should apologise even though it wasn't wholly my fault, just to regain something of a more pleasant atmosphere. But I won't back down completely and apologise without him doing the same.
How would you approach this? I have thought about saying something like "Can we start afresh...", but he may not feel the same way and besides, what do I follow my initial with?
Has this situation ever happened to you with a friend, colleague or even a family member which has resulted in a 'stalemate'?
I remaine polite in any interaction between them and me but they can go FTS.
In my long life this has only happened 3 times,, one I still see after 40 years and have no interest in him and ignore him.
01-03-2018, 10:21 AM
12
Re: When you fall out with a friend
Originally Posted by Surfermom
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A disagreement is not worth being miserable at work or losing a friend/collegue over, Floydy. Take the first step and you won't be sorry however it works out. Men are so good at making amends and putting conflict in the past.I would just start it out with a, "Life is too short and I have too much respect for you not to make amends, so what do you say about just putting our disagreement in the past?" or something of that nature. You don't necessarily have to apologize...just move on, but if you sense he needs an apology, give one. It will make you the bigger man.
Good luck!
01-03-2018, 10:29 AM
13
Re: When you fall out with a friend
It depends how much you value the friendship and if the reason for falling out can be resolved or if it's possible to continue with a difference of opinion.If you think the friendship can be salvaged then get on with it Floydy, because at some point you will go past the point of no return!
01-03-2018, 10:33 AM
14
Re: When you fall out with a friend
Floydy, Is it worth the bad atmosphere and awkward moments you both must be going through?It sounds like it is pride and the principle of it all that is holding you both back?
Buy him a cream cake or something and hand it to him with a big smile!!
01-03-2018, 10:34 AM
15
Re: When you fall out with a friend
I fell out with a friend a few years ago. It was a shame because we used to have such a laugh together. I won't go into details either but it was totally my fault and work related but what I couldn't understand is why he couldn't get over it. Surely that's what friends are about. I tried a couple of times but he didn't want to know so we went our separate ways. Luckily, I didn't have to work with him.I agree life is too short to bear a grudge but it's also too short to worry about it. Personally I would try to make up once and if he's not keen then forget about it, any awkwardness from then on is down to him.
01-03-2018, 10:37 AM
16
Re: When you fall out with a friend
You never know he may be thinking the same, just needs one of you to actually say you are sorry and want to move on, how you say it obviously can be a real apology or if you did nothing wrong just a sorry for getting so heated and a general life's too short as has been suggested.A cake mends all things IMO
01-03-2018, 11:55 AM
20
Re: When you fall out with a friend
Try to make it up but if it starts on the same old argument once again then kick em to the curb. Some are fond of rehashing over and over.I also find that things are never the same after a bad falling out and get reduced to an aquaintance level rather than a true friendship again. Nothing wrong with that.
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