The Quest
Once upon a time in a land, far, far away, three men set off on a great adventure.
Bidding the Innkeeper farewell, the three men and their guide set off in their Golden Carriage pulled by many horses, and headed South to find the fabled caves wherein fish swam and glass boats plied their trade across an underground lake.
Two mountain ranges lay between them and their destination, but according to their guide, heading first South and then turning almost North along safe and well-maintained Turnpikes in a V-shaped journey would be quicker than trying to cross the two mountains and the Badlands in between.
After a long but otherwise uneventful journey they arrived in an unfamiliar land. After a brief search they found what they sought, but there was a guardian at the cave entrance who demanded a forfeit be paid. Money of unfamiliar type and denominations swiftly changed hands, and the young men headed below, leaving their guide to watch over their carriage lest there be bandits around, bent on thievery and skulduggery.
Surprisingly, as the three men descended they found they could still see. Set into the walls were strange lights that glowed without flame, marking their way.
The air got warmer as they continued down. Shadows danced amongst the lights and sounds of water dripping, voices, footsteps, and noises they did not recognise accompanied them. Suddenly they came upon a huge cavern where light danced off the surface of a rippled lake, and there, tied to a small jetty was one of the fabled glass boats.
A man appeared out of the shadows and pointed to the boat, telling the men to climb aboard, then all at once they were on the water with fish swimming all around them. Colours flashed and reflected from more magical lights attached to the keel of the boat as creatures they had never seen before swam under them.
For a long-time the men sat in silence and awe, watching the spectacular creatures swim and prance around the boat, but all too soon it was time to return to shore. They thanked the boatman and then set off on the steep climb back to daylight, memories of the flashing colours momentarily confusing them amongst the unfamiliar lights set into clay bowls on the rock walls.
Eventually they reached the surface and breathed the sweet fresh air, clearing their lungs of the black-damp filled, dank, cloying element of the “other-world”.
“I’m hungry,” said the oldest of the three, so they set off in search of a local hostelry in the nearby town. They ate well and quenched their corporeal thirst, but needed to quench their thirst for knowledge as well, asking their host about the mythical giant beast that was once said to have wandered the land.
“Well,” said their serving wench, “there was once a great but benign beast made of iron with a ferocious fire in its belly that used to “walk” using iron wheels upon immensely long rods of steel. It would snort smoke and steam, and belched fire from its tall peculiar shaped snout as it moved. As long as its belly of fire was fed, it took delight in carrying people and their chattels upon its back to lands far distant, and never once did it harm anyone or anything.
But the rulers of the land did not like such a beast to roam the land. It was more powerful and more popular than them, so they ordered it to be killed.”
As the men walked back to their carriage, they mused on this sad tale. After a brief discussion, the men, being curious, wanted to see more of this strange land and its people, and so decided to cross the mountains and flatlands to journey back to their own realm, and instructed their guide accordingly.
They left the town and were soon travelling through open countryside before arriving at a very run-down village made of ramshackle and falling down wooden huts. The land around the huts was littered with all sorts of debris and a few discarded broken wagons. The locals halted what they were doing and stared as the men passed through. A little unsettled, the men wanted to keep going rather than stop in what appeared to be such an unwelcome looking place.
On the far side of the village, the carriage started to climb, zig-zagging, gently at first but ever steepening. Once, almost at the pinacle, they espied an overturned wagon that looked like it had tumbled down the mountainside and then just been left by the roadside where it fell.
Eventually they reached the top where they rested the horses for a while, and gazed down across the plain a mile below them. The air was crisp and clear, and they could see the second mountain range far away in the distance.
They zag-zigged carefully down the slope of the mountain and then started across the plains. Then their guide, who up to then had been most reliable, made an error, telling them to turn left onto a smaller road, but there was no road to be seen.
Later on, the guide made another mistake. This time there was indeed a road but gradually the hard surface disappeared and they found themselves in front of a large house with madly barking dogs. Thankfully there was enough room to turn their carriage around and return to the main highway.
Sadly, the men had to question the knowledge of their guide a third time when they were told to turn towards a small lake. The guide said there would be a gravelled road leading round to the far side. Well this was true, but there was a gate barring their way to the road which was locked shut, and no toll-keeper’s house, let alone a toll-keeper in sight.
Wearily they went back and forth to manoeuvre their carriage and returned to the original road and continued towards the mountain. Suddenly, mounted and armed warriors appeared and ordered them to stop in the name of their ruler. However, the men had nothing to fear. The warriors quickly asked them a few questions and with a cheery wave, set them back on their way.
Gradually the baron land changed to open fields, giving way to small welcoming towns before the carriage made its way uneventfully up over the wooded mountainside and down the other. Now they were in familiar territory, eventually finding a small cart-track that led to the city where they lived.
Soon they were entering the city limits, and their inn finally drew into sight.
Before entering they settled their coach with its attendant horses, and went inside to talk about their adventure whilst quaffing a well-deserved ale or three.
And that my friends, is how my colleagues and I spent a day off whilst we were working away from home a few years ago.