Putting something away ????

There are those that can, and those that can't, this is aimed at those that can.

Now that the kids have left home, saddled themselves with a mortgage etc etc, just as you did when you started out on lifes rocky road, and you have, shall we say, a little 'spare cash" around, do you, or would think you have a moral right to start an ISA whatever for the grandchildren.

From a purely selfish aspect I don't put a little bit away for others, no matter who.

I consider I have made my way in life, have supported a family , (as did my wife by working), brought them up to be responsible and confident. During those years, both of us went without, neither having holidays with or without the kids, only ever going out when to a function when paid for by the firm, whatever, buying for ourselves only when NEEDING it and not WANTING it.

Like so many others we did it by choice, no complaints, no arguements, it was solely our choice to go that way, but now we are retired, that millstone of a mortgage has been lifted from our shoulders, we are now feeding just two.

We capitalised on selling our Bungalow when the market was at its peak and moved to spend our retirement here in France, we are enjoying our lifestyle, I think we both deserve our "rewards"

We do NOT put a little away to give our kids / grandkids a better start in life, we are spending their inheritance and thoroughly enjoying it, and why don't we, well, when both of us have popped our clogs and have left this mortal coil, our kids will recieve all that we leave --our house here in France --- whatever monies we have -- whatever value there is in the house, i.e. say a painting they will have it all, but until that day comes, we are making up for all the things we went without in order to get here

Whate your opinions, and do you --put a little by???.

Re: Putting something away ????

I guess I am a 'can't ' being retired,single and on a small income but would if I could

I do however contribute in other ways supplying the children with home made bread/marmalade/pickles/biscuits etc, cooking meals and a lot of babysitting including 6.45am to 6pm some days.
I think my family would consider this to be of greater value than any ISA.

Re: Putting something away ????

I'm afraid I have to agree with you on this one Jonesy..

Parents and grandparents are ruining their offspring's lives by spoiling them rotten. Some kids are even middle aged, and that useless they can't boil an egg by the time they leave home. There is no better builder of character than adversity, and this most basic of things is being denied to most of today's youth, with dire consequences to come methinks.

Like you Jonesy, our kids are welcome to anything that's left when we go, but until then they must struggle and overcome life's problems by their own efforts, and they will be rewarded with self respect and the strength to cope with anything the world then throws at them, as we were......

Re: Putting something away ????

This may be one of the subjects where males and females differ in their attitude.

We are not rich, but we are very fortunate and, through luck and a bit of judgement, we are now in the happy situation where we have everything we need (and reasonably want even). There is spare and we can live happily on our retirement income and still save from it - more than we want to spend. So, apart from my time, I want to and do put something aside for my children and grandchildren. I hope the savings for our grandchildren will put them through university if they want to go.
When my parent's died my sister and I inherited their hard earned savings and house and I have already passed all but a small amount of it on to my two children, who now have bought decent houses without huge mortgages. I think my parents would have approved of that.
I would like my children and my grandchildren to be more secure than we were. I have this little theory that (barring misfortunes) it could well be possible, by their own endeavours and with a bit of help, for following generations to "do better" than their parents, educationally and materially. I could be heading for disappointment, but when I am dead I won't know the outcome of my theory and, in the absence of any other burning desire, I am prepared to take the gamble.

Re: Putting something away ????

I agree, male and female attitudes will vary on this subject, and yes I know things they are achanging, but I think in my day, well in the early part of my married life the men went out to work and the woman stayed at home--cooked --washed --- looked after the kids, so MAN was basically the one in charge.

These days however what with women bring home an equal wage things have moved on from my time, and women tend now to be more demanding in the "running of the house", such ways as child minders being paid for to enable Mummy to go out and earn. each having their own cars, whether they be Company or privately owned ones thus giving them both an independance not experienced in my day.

But men think in the same manner as Plantman and myself, ( there will of course always be the one that doesn't) in that weve had to struggle for all weve gained, either by going without or simply not being able to afford things, there weren't the "social benefits" that are flying around in all directions like there are these days, and we had a self respect in ourselves that we were the providers, ( purely a male thingy).

Because of this we think our offspring should learn via the "university of life" and not get help and assistance from us, we didn't get it and it didn't do us any harm going without for the sake of our kids and lifestyle, so why should it hurt them.

Perhaps I am too cynical as I think had I have "put aside a little for my grandkids they would, at the age of eighteen come into inheriting it, and I feel that all my endeavour would be wasted on a bang up holiday on the "Costa Wherever", or wasted on --- "must have " --- items like these state of the art mobile phones that are out of date before youv'e bought them.

Wheras, when we have both popped our clogs, the money initially will go t directly to our kids, what they choose to do with it is, as Aerolor said, no concern of ours as we will dead and gone.

Re: Putting something away ????

Eek! Me too!

I haven't got any surplus money over ... but nor have I had any kids ( which I still think is one of the few things I've done right in my life). No regrets whatsoever.

But in principle ... I agree with Jonsey and plantman. Your own hardgotten gains are just that. Your own. I say, spend it on yourself. You did the hard work ... you get the enjoyment.

Re: Putting something away ????

Heyyyyyyy Morticia -- are you trying to make me look human ????? agreeing with me AGAIN lololol

Re: Putting something away ????

I am one of those women who has worked for most of her life, married and unmarried, and I hope nobody thinks I am bragging when I say we have all we need and some to spare. Like I said we are not rich by any means, but we have been lucky. Both of us have worked hard and both have contributed to the family finances. It has been a partnership and with equal says in what we do. We are both able to argue our particular cause - although I will always argue that I have worked (and still in retirement work) harder than him - a lot of women do.

Re: Putting something away ????

Of course ... I reckon deep down you're a big softie.

Re: Putting something away ????

That's not bragging at all. That's someone expressing well deserved pride in their own self-acheivement.