How Easily Did You Adjust To Your Retirement?
I am asking because I retired finally in 2015 after working non-stop for 52 years apart from a couple of weeks each time to welcome my gorillas into the world. (My undying gratitude to both sets of parents xx).
At first, it took me a long time to even relax. The last day at work was especially strange. Just knowing it was to be the very last time as I stepped onto my commuter train and greeted by all those lovely friends I had been travelling with for years, the same crowd that I knew so well over the years that we met up for dinner once a month, there they were, cheering me, giving me cards, flowers and chocs, it was rather surreal. When the noise subsided, I just wanted to weep, What was I doing being in the position of the person never again to share a laugh with them, never going to have a salary paid into my bank account ever again, never look forward to the weeks and days to my always looked forward to two week annual holiday twice a year, or loving the relief of coming out of the office on a Friday evening, knowing that I had two lovely days off at the weekend. All gone after today, Finished. Finito, No more, Ever!
Truth be told, I didn’t even want to think about it, but I did, I sat there thinking “How has this come about, I had always been one of the crowd on the train who was the first to cheer and give a hug to others in our group who were retiring. I never imagined that my turn would ever come! And yet here it was. My last day. It was such a mixture of emotions.
I’ve always been a confident person when it comes to work. I cannot think of any work position that I have ever applied for, that I haven’t been successful in getting. But the horrible knowledge that after that day, should the need ever arise where I needed money to survive, was quite frightening as I had to finally admit to myself that I would never have a cat in hell’s chance of ever being offered a job again at the age of 67 That really hurt! I now saw myself as deadwood!! Surplus to requirement, past it, application form screwed up and binned!
I know, I shouldn’t have been thinking that way, but that’s exactly how I felt on that last day.
The first Monday after that Friday was also very strange. After kissing he who must obey as he went happily off to work (my toyboy, 4 years younger than me) I turned into a tornado, starting in the first bedroom, with black binbags aplenty, polish, dusters etc, I tackled every single job that I had always meant to do but never seemed to find the time to do so. I emptied every single drawer, chucking away everything that I had been meaning to chuck away for years but always hoarded as sure would need again. Then I tackled the wardrobe, out, out, out. Once all that was done, I cleaned and hoovered that room within an inch of it’s life! Tuesday, Wednesday it was the other rooms, then it was downstairs. My home was a spick and span palace.
Then I thought of the garden and the deck, lots of which needed doing, so I set to. It took me the rest of the remaining summer months to get it just how I wanted, (credit card was screaming!) but the end results were beautiful.
The problem was that every time I sat down for longer than 30 minutes, I felt damn guilty, as though I shouldn’t be sitting there doing nothing and feeling like a slob. One day, the tv was on and Jeremy Kyle happened to come on. OMG! No way, I had to switch it off quickly. I often laughed with others at people who just slobbed about at home watching this programme, I just didn’t want to be one of them.
God, it was hard to adjust after a lifetime of working. It is only now, almost 2 years later, that I have finally learned to relax, take things easy without feeling so guilty, enjoy waking up in the morning, knowing that I can do whatever I want to do without worrying about time. I am finally enjoying my retirement.
After that bloomin long saga, I would be really interested in knowing how anyone else felt on their last day before retiring and how they adjusted to their new way of life in the days, weeks and months after? Were you happy? Sad? Glad?