22-09-2011, 05:52 PM
1
what would you do?
My late husband had one brother who lives locally. Every year for about 15 years, we visited them for lunch on New Years Day. I spent about £300 each year on presents for the family including a neice, nephew and their four children. When he had prostate cancer, I took my husband in his wheelchair to the hospital every day to visit. This was no mean feat I tell you. My brother-in-law never once offered to take hubbie out for a walk to give me a break for an hour or so. Their whole family, all 11 of them came to my son's wedding and all 11 came to hubbies funeral two years ago. Whilst on the phone last night, the sister-in-law casually mentioned that the grand-daughter had got married a few weeks ago. It was a big wedding with a posh reception. Why is it that I feel insulted that it was not considered to invite me? Am I being unreasonable at being upset to be left out? My instinct is to completely write off this side of the family altogether. There, rant over...but what would you do?
22-09-2011, 06:14 PM
2
Re: what would you do?
I understand your feelings Meg. I am not sure what I would or could do, but I know I would feel hurt and upset. You are not being at all unreasonable, but I don't think I would go as far as to write them off, especially if they were important to me, although this thoughtlessness would make me very cool towards them for a while. I wonder if "in-laws" tend to be left out of things sometimes - I know I experience it occasionally with my husband's sisters.
23-09-2011, 11:09 AM
4
Re: what would you do?
It is a very difficult postion to be in. I would also feel hurt that I had not been invited to the wedding, did you actually know that it was going to take place, please dont write all of them off, but i think i would ask at some point why i was not invited.Unfortunately this happens a lot, i get told when babies are about to be born and presents are expected, but the everyday but then not kept uptodate on other things.
not an easy one.
23-09-2011, 01:30 PM
6
Re: what would you do?
No it is not unreasonable to be upset when you feel you have been neglected. How many people have felt they have been snubbed when not given expected recognition. If you feel that you can face a confrontation then ask the appropriate person or people for an explanation as to why you were not included. Depending on what the answer is you can then decide if the relationships have any real value to yourself.
25-09-2011, 02:08 AM
7
Re: what would you do?
Originally Posted by Uncle Joe
->
Shrug shoulders, move on, no more xmas or birthday prezzies or cards from you and totally ignore them in future and cut them right out of your life as if they don't exist!!!!
I agree with Uncle Joe.
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